


Dead Gods Still Live

by l8rose



Series: Dead Gods [2]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Destiny, Loss, Madness, Magic, Multi, Not Beta Read, Only updating Characters tags as they show up in the story, Post-Canon, Regret, Solavallen Hell, Spoilers, Suffering, Torture, Unforgotten, Unforgotten Canon, i still suck at tagging
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-01
Updated: 2017-06-01
Packaged: 2021-03-03 21:07:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 28,836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24752116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/l8rose/pseuds/l8rose
Summary: Ethara has entered Uthenera to recover from her actions against the Cult of Madness but things are never easy.The Qunari have finally chosen to invade, other elvhen have begun to search for something in the Arlathan forest but worst of all, she had felt someone begin to pray to her.Forced to wake as Thedas once more needs the Inquisitor, she embarks on a journey back to Skyhold and must come to terms with her new place in the world as something more than a Dalish Elf.
Relationships: Female Lavellan/Solas, Fen'Harel | Solas/Female Lavellan, Lavellan/Solas (Dragon Age)
Series: Dead Gods [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1789915
Comments: 2
Kudos: 7





	1. Dread Wolf and the Red Halla

**Author's Note:**

> Recommended that Dead Gods Still Dream be read first as this is the second part to that story and a lot of content will **not** make sense without it.
> 
> Initially this was a part of DGSD but as I'm getting back into the swing of updating things, I wanted to move the second part to it's own section and slap a complete on the first part at where it appropriately ends.

They say time flies when you're enjoying yourself and for us it was no different.

Solas showed me things in the fade that I had never imagined possible, and for a while, it was like it had been back in Elvhenan.

I simply lost track of time.

It was not that I forgot my friends, or the troubles of the waking world, it was just that it was one eternal day in the fade. It was the same as when I had been trapped in the hall of memories but this time, there was always something new to see or to learn.

I learned what a Dreamer, a somniari, was truly capable of.

How to forge pathways between dreams and how to change them.

Instinctively, I had found my way to him before but I learned how to do that without it being him.

The fade became my playground. Solas and I slid easily from dream to dream. Sometimes simply to watch, other times to guide someone into a gentler dream. Never did we show ourselves as elvhen, instead taking to the two forms of his old painting.

The Dread Wolf and the Red Halla.

I only truly became aware of the amount of time when I heard it for the first time.


	2. What Dreams Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ethara learns things have changed in the waking world, especially about her. Cole interrupts.

_We had been travelling through the fade together, seeking out an elusive spirit that Faith had told us about that had been reclusive but curious about us. We were in the part of the fade that did not belong to a dreaming mind, a shifting sort of landscape that was as mutable as any dream. Solas had chosen to give it the form of a path as we walked, making it a little more exciting then just a shifting nothingness._

_I knew he did it partially because that nothingness always unsettled me, reminding me of Sum'banal. The fade had reacted to my terror the first time and Solas instantly changed it to a glade and held me until I could explain what exactly bothered me about a nothingness like that._

_We had been walking, side by side, when I felt a strange tug which stopped me in my tracks. It was nothing like the compulsion I had felt to obey him but there was an insistence to it._

_It almost felt like a whisper but it was nothing like the whisper of Tu'Salhasis, this felt almost warm. If a whisper could even feel warm._

“ _Ethara?” Solas questioned as he stopped next to me, his eyes searching my face for some answer as to why I had just stopped._

“ _Do you feel that?” I asked, turning my head in the direction that I thought the feeling was coming from._

_He went silent for a moment, gently taking my hand as he listened to the quiet of the fade. There was that flare of power in his eyes for the briefest of moments before it subsided back to that normal blue with the faintest hint of violet. His fingers tightened on mine before he spoke._

“ _I was wondering when that would happen.” His voice was soft, almost concerned as if he was worried about what I might say in reaction to his words._

“ _Wondering when what would happen?” I tilted my face towards his even as the tugging feeling died and left behind an unusual feeling somewhere between calm and need._

“ _It seems that the elves we left behind have decided to treat you as a goddess.” He said with a brief sigh chasing the words. “It will probably be the first of many.”_

_I took in a deep breath as I heard what he said. They had called me a goddess, Ash'ter the First Betrayed but no one had actively thought me as such. I only knew my own supposed legend because I had been the First to a Keeper, not that I had been aware of the story speaking about me until recently. To hear that someone was praying to me and that there would be more following was a bit unsettling to say the least._

“ _You mean... someone somewhere is praying to me?” I tried to keep my voice even but I failed at it._

“ _Yes, someone who believes in you is praying.” Solas' thumb rubbed over the back of my hand in a comforting gesture. He knew my stance on the Evanuris, the false gods, and how I felt about people shouting my name like I was some holy being. “We.. we can go there if you like.”_

_I stared at him before shaking my head quickly. I had no interest in that idea, not at all. I did not want to be the being that people prayed to when they needed help. That was a responsibility and a curse all rolled up into one._

“ _No.” I said it quickly. I had never wanted to be a thing of legend, to be worshipped. First as the Herald of Andraste and now as Ash'ter. The fact that people were putting me on a higher pedestal made me feel a little ill._

_Solas clearly saw my thoughts on my face as he tugged me closer, wrapping his arms around me and crushing me to his chest. Even if this was the fade, there was comfort and familiarity in his arms and I could almost feel the real warmth of him._

“ _Then we will not.” His voice was soothing as he leaned his forehead against mine. “You do not have to be what they want you to be.”_

_They wanted me to be some symbol of what once was and what they hoped would happen again. No doubt praying to me like they had prayed to him and others in the past._

“ _Solas?” I questioned, tilting back to look up at him. “Have you been hearing them pray to you?”_

_I had never asked the question before but it had never seemed relevant to anything at all. Of course, I had not known he was Fen'Harel until after he had left the Inquisition. A lifetime ago for me but only little more then a year for him._

“ _Only recently.” He said with a small laugh. “You have to remember, the Dalish viewed me as the Trickster God.”_

_It had been a while since he had referred to the Dalish as my people. Especially not since he had become aware of my parentage. Something we had never really discussed as that seemed to be a wound he did not want to think about. I didn't want to think about it either._

“ _And in Elvhenan?”_

“ _Yes.” He smiled at me. “But I was apparently preoccupied with a certain mage who kept rebuffing my advances.”_

_I felt the blush creeping up my cheeks as his smile turned a little wolfish. He had regained his memories of the ten years I had spent in Elvhenan with him and Mythal. How his younger self had taken to stalking my dreams when he was not able to see me in the waking world. The memories had changed him, made him more open. He had answered every question I had for him._

“ _You didn't complain.” I managed with a laugh._

“ _No, but then I enjoyed the hunt.” He smirked as he leaned down to press his lips against mine._

_He had kissed me many, many times since I had regained awareness in the fade. Each one firm and full of centuries long need that had been finally answered. Plush lips and the press of his tongue seeking entrance into my mouth. And I was always eager to return that feeling._

_His hands had moved, one against my lower back while the other tangled in my hair – now suddenly loose around his fingers in answer to the fade bending to his will – as he held me against him. My hands gripped his tunic and helped keep us as close as we could get with our clothes on._

“ _Solas...” I breathed against his lips. “We're never going to get to the spirit if you -”_

“ _The spirit can wait.” He growled as he returned his lips to mine._

_The fade once more bent to his will and the surrounding area became my room at Skyhold. The large bed was the main draw but then so were the walls. I had learned early on that the simple act of thinking of walls could keep others out, no doubt that was what he was considering now as he half directed me, half carried me to the edge of the bed. He had come up with other places but Skyhold always seemed to be among his favourites._

_He pulled away for a moment, sliding his tunic over his head. It was an act grounded in the physical world as we both knew that all it took was a thought for the two of us to be naked. The fade was easy for us both to control but we had both silently agreed to the idea of removing our clothing the normal way. My eyes always followed the line of his shirt as it went up before sliding back down over him slowly. I propped myself up on my elbows to just look at him._

_It wasn't the first time and it definitely was not going to be the last that I just oogled him._

_The corner of his lips were tilted up in a half smile as he saw me looking. He leaned towards me, his hands circling around my back to lift me off the bed and closer to him. His mouth kissed at the edge of my ear, lips beginning to form words. No doubt something that would set my heart racing._

“ _Cole? What are you doing here?”_

_That... was not what I had been expecting._

_Solas let me go and I fell backwards on the bed and stared up to the head where Cole was sitting, nestled among the pillows with an almost confused look on his face. He still had that glow but he retained the form that I knew him as. The young human._

_Cole had visited us many times since the first time. He was one of many spirits that enjoyed the company of Solas and me. Spirits that normally gave us a wide berth whenever things drifted in the direction they had been going._

“ _Hello, Cole.” I said with a smile for him even if I felt a little annoyed at his sudden arrival. I had been so wrapped up in Solas that I hadn't even noticed the spirit's arrival._

“ _Dorian has been searching the fade.” He said softly as his head tilted in an owlish manner. His eyes were wide as they flicked from me to Solas and then back. “Important. Needs to talk but she's not there. No answer on the crystal. Sleeping. Must be sleeping.”_

_I was startled by the statement and moved to sit up, Solas sliding to my side as his shirt reappeared on his body. There was irritation in his eyes but concern as well. Neither of us had sensed Dorian seeking me out in the fade._

“ _He's looking for me?” I asked, just to be certain even if Cole's cryptic words were proof enough of that._

“ _Yes.” Cole didn't blink as he stared at me with a curious expression._

“ _Is he dreaming right now?” I could just reach out with my dreaming ability but it was just easier to ask._

“ _Yes.”_

“ _Cole, is something wrong?” Solas asked the question, a frown crossing his features as he regarded the Spirit of Compassion._

“ _You wanted her clothing off.” Cole said, confusion colouring his voice. “But you wanted to use your teeth. Wouldn't it be easier to use your hands?”_

_We both just stared at him before I quirked an eyebrow at Solas who's face was a mask of complete calm._

“ _Teeth, eh?” I asked and had the satisfaction of a slight blush travelling over his ears._

“ _We'll discuss that later, vhenan.” He managed a wolfish grin at me before sliding off the edge of the bed. His tone of voice full of promise._

_I couldn't help but shiver at the thought._

“ _He wants to use his teeth on other places too.”_

_This time I blushed. We may have been in love with each other for thousands of years but it had taken my entry into uthenera for our relationship to get to a more physical level. I knew he had wanted to when he was part of the Inquisition but he had believed it wasn't right to engage in that. Especially when I did not know he was Fen'Harel. Everything just kept getting in the way after that._

“ _Cole.” Solas said in exasperation. “Thank you for telling us that Dorian is looking for Ethara.”_

“ _You're welcome.” Cole said with a smile before vanishing into the fade. His voice hung in the air. “He's in Tevinter, dreaming.”_

_I sighed before looking over at Solas. The irritation faded from his eyes as he slid off the bed and held out his hand to me._

“ _We can continue this later.” He said softly. “You should go find out what your friend wanted.”_

_I took his hand and pulled myself to my feet. He leaned close against me, his way of keeping physical contact despite us being in the fade._

“ _Will you come with me?” I asked._

_There was a small frown on his features before he sighed._

“ _Alright, but you know that he might not be happy to see me.”_

“ _Well, you can always disguise yourself.” I said with a shake of my head and a laugh. We had so often travelled as wolf and halla that I knew it was just as easy as breathing for him._

“ _Very well.” There was a small laugh in his voice as if he knew what I was thinking._

_I took a breath and the walls fell from around us. It had become second nature, changing the fade as I saw fit and now it was like an extension of my will. There was a noise of approval as I undid what he had done. He delighted in the abilities I had._

_Enraptured was a better term for it._

_I knew he didn't see me like he had, now, I was an equal to him. Although there had been moments that I caught a glance that hinted he might think I was more then that. A look of awe._

_That was just as unsettling as knowing people were praying to me but those looks were so quick that I never really had the chance to bring it up._

“ _Come, let us find him.”_

_We walked from the fade version of my room, the shapes returning to nothingness as we moved away from it. It was not a long walk from the image of Skyhold to Dorian's dream as the fade did not obey the same principles as the waking world. Distance had meaning but not when it came to those dreams that reached the fade. It was simple to walk from one to another._

_Solas had explained that it was possible to wander all the way from the known lands to cross the oceans, and to see the places beyond that, while I remained in uthenera but it would become more difficult with the distance from my body. Dreams were different, especially if I knew the person that was dreaming. I would always be able to find those that were closest to me if I willed it._

_This time was no different and I imagined a path that would take me to Dorian. It took a direct route and we passed through several dreams along our way. Always cautious to keep ourselves to the outskirts so that those sleeping people only saw a pair of elves in the background. I knew we had slipped into the dreams of people in Tevinter when the scenery changed._

_Dorian's dream was up ahead, shining like a beacon in the shifting space of the fade. We didn't say anything as we slipped from this dream and into his._

_I looked over everything as it changed. He was dreaming of a library that was familiar. A circular room and a set of stone stairs that led down to the lower level. He was reclining in a chair beneath a window._

“ _The library at Skyhold.” Solas said softly to me. “Remember, this was his favourite haunt.”_

_I nodded my thanks to him. I had forgotten much about the little things of Skyhold, the library was included in that. I had only ever really gone there to speak with Dorian as I was usually preoccupied with Solas a floor below._

_Solas only stopped there, stepping away from me and letting himself shift from his elvhen form into that of the wolf. The form was huge, and normally quite fearsome but he chose to stick with just two eyes instead of the several._

_I ran my fingers through the fur over the back of his head and just behind the base of his ear. The form was completely wolf save for the eyes. Those were his, even if they were the wrong colour, it was Solas that stared back at me from within the black fur._

“ _Come, let's see what would cause Dorian to send Cole to find me.”_


	3. Friend

_Dorian remained seated on that chair, a book open in his lap. I knew he wasn't reading it as his gaze was fixated towards the window._

_I doubted he could see anything out there._

“ _Dorian.” I called softly as I strode into his view._

_Solas remained in wolf form, hanging back a little but watching Dorian carefully. The red eyes peering intently at the mage as if he believed this was some sort of trick._

“ _Ethara?” Dorian blinked from where he sat, his head jerking in my direction in surprise. “You're really here?”_

“ _Well in the fade anyway.” I said with a small laugh as I took a step closer._

_I knew he was still asleep and probably thought this was no more then a dream. Reaching with my power, like Solas had taught me, I gently tugged him a little closer to waking. Not enough to wake him up fully but enough that he understood that this was a dream and that my essence or spirit was there with him._

_Dorian jumped up from his chair, the book falling to the side and the table nearly knocked over, and raced over to put his arms around me in a tight hug._

“ _Goodness, you're a sight for sore eyes.” Dorian let go of the hug before taking a step back. Up close, I could see the tired lines on his face. The dark circles that had even made their way into the fade. “When you didn't come back, we all feared the worst.”_

_I grimaced at him, knowing he was probably unaware of my slipping into uthenera. I was a little more concerned with his state of being then of explaining that._

“ _Sorry, if I'd known, I would have contacted you.” I apologized._

“ _Really, where have you been for the last year?”_

“ _A... a year?” I stumbled over the concept that I had been sleeping for a year already. It seems I was going to have to have a talk with Solas after this was all said and done._

“ _You didn't realize it's been a year?” Dorian stared at me before sighing and rubbing the bridge of his nose like he had a headache. “I knew we shouldn't have let the Sentinels take you but Cole was so insistent. He didn't think we were capable of healing you after whatever happened in that hall.”_

“ _Well, it's a bit complicated to explain.” I grimaced again as I altered the fade to form a chair for myself._

“ _Ethara...?” Dorian stared at me as I dropped myself into the chair. He almost looked frightened._

“ _Oh, right... sorry.” I gave him a small smile. “I've been learning how to bend the fade to my will.”_

“ _You're... you're a somniari?” He gasped it out, mouth hanging open in surprise. It was easy for him to make the connection, to understand that I was something entirely different then the average mage._

“ _Yes but the veil initially dampened the ability. Being back in Elvhenan woke it up.” Among other things. “It's taken some time to get used to.”_

“ _I can imagine.” He shook his head before pulling his chair upright to sit in it. “I was aware of Solas being capable of it, that's why I was searching for him. I knew if he actually answered then he'd be able to find you and I could get you to return to Skyhold.”_

_I blinked, startled that he had actually been looking for Solas in the fade. If he noticed, Solas paid it no mind; still just a silent presence at the back of the dream._

“ _What has happened?” I questioned._

“ _Simply put, Thedas has gone to the void in a hand basket.” Dorian sighed. “Cassandra has had to step in and temporarily take charge of the Inquisition because you've been gone, Cullen has been helping as well but people are starting to wonder.”_

_I almost wanted to tell him that it's better for the Inquisition to be in the hands of Cassandra and Cullen. It had been several thousand years since I actually acted the part. Even if the majority of that time was spent locked behind the veil, I doubted I could effectively pull off the role of Inquisitor._

“ _The Chantry in Orlais has been requesting your presence, Leliana has been doing what she can on her end but it's getting to the point that even she can't contain the rumours.” Dorian continued._

“ _Why would the Chantry want to see me?” I asked, startled by the question._

“ _You haven't heard?” Dorian paused before sighing. “Of course not. You've been here in the fade.”_

_He rubbed his face for a moment, looking uncharacteristically frazzled._

“ _The Qunari have invaded Tevinter.” His voice was flat._

“ _What? When?” I sucked in a breath of fade air as I leaned closer to him. “Are you safe, Dorian?”_

“ _Of course I am.” He said with a forced laugh, waving his hand in the air as if that would chase away my concern. “I am in Minrathous, they have decided to launch an attack across the Ventosus straits, they've taken over many of the little towns but it's clear that they're targeting the city of Qarinus.”_

_I tried to think of where that was. It had been so long since I looked at a map of Thedas that was current._

“ _That's not the worst part.” Dorian sighed again. “It seems that their goal is not fully to take on Tevinter just yet, they're trying to get a foothold on the mainland. I believe their main target is actually the Arlathan Forest.”_

“ _There shouldn't be anything in the Forest to interest them.” I responded, I knew what had been there once before but thousands of years had passed since Arlathan disappeared. It was something I had never questioned Solas about as I honestly dreaded the answer._

“ _There is a growing group of elves there.” Dorian said as he peered at me between his fingers. “The Chantry believes that you may be the one leading them, invoking the name of an Elvhen goddess, Ash'ter.”_

“ _You can't be ser-” Then I remembered the prayer. Someone was invoking_ me _and now I was certain it was from the forest._

“ _No one in the Inquisition believes you're the leader but I know that's what some of the elves called you.” Dorian said softly, cutting off any further words but not explaining how he knew that. “We don't know what you've been up to over the last year but we need you, Ethara. We all hate what the Inquisition set you up as but you're the person Thedas needs right now. Everyone knows you saved them from Corypheus, even here in Tevinter.”_

_I sighed as I looked over towards the edge of the dream. I did not want to be the person people relied on this much but I knew I couldn't leave them all behind. Especially not my friends who were too good for the places they were in._

“ _Very well.” I said with a sigh. “I'll try to get back to Skyhold when I wake up but you have to promise me that you'll find out what's going on with the elves in Arlathan Forest.”_

“ _Good as done.” Dorian sighed yet again but this time it was in relief. “Varric has some friends that are capable of getting in. All that they've learned so far is that they're being led by an elf named Myal. She's gathered many of the followers that had once followed Solas but she's claimed to be a servant of Ash'ter.”_

_I blinked, startled at that. I had expected him to say that Mythal was leading the elves, not some elf that I'd never heard of. Solas was still quiet so I guessed I'd have to ask him about that later. Still, I could not help but voice my confusion over it not being Mythal._

“ _What of Mythal?” I asked._

“ _What of her?” Dorian quirked a well manicured eyebrow at me._

“ _Is she leading any of the elves?”_

“ _Not to our knowledge.” He shook his head. “Mythal – or Flemeth if you prefer – hasn't been seen since the time you and Morrigan went into the fade after Morrigan's son.”_

_I felt my stomach twist when I realized that he was not aware that I had pulled Mythal through the veil. That meant that she had hidden herself during the end of the battle with Radinan._

“ _Why so interested?” Dorian asked with a curious look. “It's not like Mythal involved herself with the elves prior to revealing herself to you and Morrigan.”_

“ _No, that's true.” I said with a sigh before turning my attention to that nagging question. “Dorian, what happened after Cullen called the retreat?”_

“ _Bull carried me out.” He said as if that answered the question. “Something about Solas shouting at us and the Sentinels all high tailing it out of the hall had Bull obeying without question. We... we left you in there.”_

_There was guilt in his face and his voice. It painted a picture for me. He had refused the order only to have Bull pull him out._

_I leaned over to put my hand on his, giving him a sympathetic look._

“ _I... I'm sorry.” Dorian said as he squeezed his eyes shut for a brief moment. “Sometimes I still see your body as the Sentinels carried it out. You weren't injured but... you were so damn pale and you had that stupid crystal hand.”_

_I lifted up my left hand, letting the fade change it to what it truly looked like. I had forgotten that he had never seen it before I had been captured by Radinan's men. There was the barest flicker of colour within the crystal. It started at green before it slid all through the spectrum of rainbow before back to green._

“ _I'll explain it later.” I said honestly. “And in person. What else happened after Bull carried you out?”_

“ _The Sentinels barred the doors.” Dorian said, a little bit perturbed by the hand. “They wouldn't let us back in which was a good thing. An explosion rocked the mountain and then... then a dragon busted it's way through the wall.”_

_That would explain where Mythal had gone after the fight._

“ _We thought the dragon was carrying you but it was some blonde elf.” Dorian said, the words chilling me to the bone. “Afterwards, the Sentinels swarmed in first with us following. We saw you lying under the rift, it was...”_

_A dragon carrying a blonde elf._

_He paused again and I thought about Mythal carrying off Radinan. My mind already a mix of emotions._

_Mythal hadn't granted me my vengeance at all._

“ _Your head was in the lap of a desire demon.” Dorian said and my attention was once more fixed on the story he was telling. There was a distant look in his eyes. “She was... just sitting there... petting your hair. The other demons, they surrounded you but they didn't make any move to attack the Sentinels as they neared.”_

_I took in another breath of air as I listened. I knew Desire had been Knowledge, the spirit that had helped me in the cell._

_I had no idea how I knew, I just did._

“ _Cole told them they needed to hand you over.” Dorian continued. “She did and they all stepped into the rift.”_

_I bit my tongue to keep from hissing. I knew what would happen to them if they tried to pass back through the veil without me there. They had all stepped through, allowing themselves to be changed and then die._

_All to save me._

_No, to save all of Thedas._

“ _Is something wrong?” Dorian asked._

“ _No.” I quickly shook my head at him.”I've just never heard of spirits doing that.”_

“ _Neither have I.” Dorian admitted. “After that, the Sentinels carried you from the hall. Cullen demanded they hand you over but the leader... uh Abelas?”_

_I nodded to him as he said the name._

“ _Abelas refused. He called you a few words in elvish and then made it clear that you would die if they didn't take you with them. I convinced the others that it was okay.”_

“ _I know.” I said with a half smile. “Cole told me. He showed up in the fade when I first regained my senses.”_

“ _He said he would.”_

“ _He's true to his word.” I agreed._

“ _We all returned to Skyhold and then went our separate ways a few weeks later.” Dorian sighed._

“ _Anything else happen that I should know about?” My voice was quiet._

“ _No, other then the Qunari and the elves, that is all I know.”_

_I nodded to him before getting up._

“ _Dorian, excuse me for saying this but you look like hell.” I said with a half smile._

“ _I haven't been sleeping much, this being a Magister business is ruining my good looks.” For a brief moment, the old Dorian was back but it didn't last long. “When you wake, please, you must contact me to ensure you're alright.”_

“ _I will.” I said with a small smile before leaning to give him a small hug. “Sleep through the rest of the night, no dreams, alright?”_

“ _Easier said then done.” Dorian said with a small laugh._

_I stepped away from him to the edge of the little dream he had and willed it to change. I let his mind slide into a more comfortable sleep where no dreams would trouble him until morning. It was the least I could do._

_I felt Solas shift behind me as the fade turned into the usual nothingness. His arms circling around me to remind me that he was there and that this was not the place I dreaded._

_I couldn't keep the shiver out of my body as I spoke._

“ _She didn't kill him.” I said flatly._

“ _I know, vhenan.” He was not happy with that either. “You will need to find Mythal when you wake.”_

“ _You're not going to wake up with me then?” I questioned as I turned to look up into his eyes, seeking a reason for why he would remain in the fade._

_His arms slid around me, locking loosely around my back._

“ _No.” There was an uncomfortable look that graced his features for a brief moment. “I will be of more help to you here within the fade. Besides.” He let his hand trail over the crystalline hand before interlocking his fingers over mine. “I gave you most of my power already, I don't think you need me to protect you.”_

“ _Well, I shouldn't need protecting so long as no one tried to stick a collar around my neck again.” I said with a small laugh that I didn't quite feel._

_Standing there, I realized I was honestly terrified of returning to the waking world. I remembered the things I had done on the road to Skyhold. Where I had simply let go and drained the life and magic from the mages that had attacked me._

“ _I don't think any one will be doing that any time soon.” He turned me to face him, his fingers sliding up along my cheeks as if he understood where my thoughts had gone again. “You are strong, Ethara, you can face whatever is thrown at you.”_

“ _Still, I would still feel much safer if you were there.”_

“ _Vhenan.” His voice was soft. “I will not. You know this.”_

_I squeezed my eyes closed but felt his lips brushing softly over mine._

“ _But I do expect you to visit me in the fade every night.” His voice was rough and I couldn't help but laugh at his words. “Promise me, you'll visit.”_

“ _I promise.” I said as I opened my eyes and looked up at him._

“ _Good.”_

_He crushed his lips against mine. Hard and fast. I knew with that kiss that he didn't want me to go but we both knew there was no other way around it. There was no way I would just leave my friends to suffer at the hands of the Qunari or whatever might be stirring in the Arlathan Forest._

“ _And I will come if you need me.” His voice was breathless as he broke the kiss. “Nothing in the world will keep me from reaching you if you need me.”_

_I could feel his power wrapping around me as he began to will me to wake._

“ _Solas... just a moment longer.” I breathed as I tried to cling to him._

_His eyes were full of love and sadness as he leaned to kiss me one more time but I couldn't feel his lips or feel him beneath my hands._

_The fade around me lost all form and I became aware of the heaviness of my limbs as I returned to the waking world._


	4. The Sentinel

Waking up was like swimming through water full of seaweed that was trying to drag me back under. My limbs felt heavy like they were wrapped up in mud and plant life. Every breath felt sluggish.

I strained against my own body as I forced by way back to the waking world. Gradually, my senses came back to me and I realized I was in a temple.

The ceiling above me was arched and had a great many designs carved across them. Halla, harts, bears, things I had never even imagined possible. Vines grew along the carvings but it was almost like the vines were trying to enhance the images, almost looking like giant trees.

There were soft blankets and pillows piled around me, and I guessed I was in a bed of some sort. It was comfortable despite the aching of my body. I honestly felt like I had tried to take on a dragon on my own.

I became aware of a presence next to me. It was strange, I could tell that it was someone else but it still felt a little bit like me which made incredibly little sense to me.

I turned my head, my neck feeling stiff and sore, and gazed over at the elf sitting next to my bed. Abelas sat there, his hands resting on his knees. He was dressed in nearly the same gear that I had seen him in last, the armour of a Sentinel of Mythal but it was missing the markings of his Goddess and that claok. His eyes were closed but I was more fascinated by the man's hair.

He had always worn a hood while in my presence but there was no mistaking the long braid of light yellow hair that trailed down over his shoulder. It was just the top of his head with hair, as long as it was, and he seemed to keep the sides of his head completely shaved. I had seen many elves with that sort of hair cut before so it was not completely surprising. I just did not expect him to have such a hair cut. It seemed more wild then I had expected.

“Ma tarlan.” The voice was soft as he opened his eyes to look over at me.

“Hello Abelas.” I responded and went to sit up. My voice even felt heavy, almost strained. “It's good to see you.”

I had not seen him since he had pushed me through the Eluvian but then I guessed, he had a year to heal whatever had been done to him as he hardly looked like he had been harmed at all.

He darted forward and his hand was against my back, helping me to a more comfortable position.

“Slowly, tarlan.” He cautioned with concern in his voice. “You should not have wakened so early from uthenera.”

“A year is not early, Abelas.”

“It is when you almost killed yourself.” Abelas' voice was almost chastising, the respect overshadowing that.

“Not that it's nice to see you Abelas... but why are you here?” I questioned. I could not think of a reason why he would be here, given that Mythal was out there roaming the world. “I would have assumed you would have gone off with Mythal now that she has returned.”

I had expected to see a Sentinel or two here guarding me but I had not expected to wake and find Abelas sitting by my bed. He was the leader of the Sentinels we found at the Well of Sorrows, or at least I assumed so as he was the one who had dictated everything to us when we arrived.

“Mythal has released us from our vows.” He answered.

“What?” I stared at him, surprise filling my voice. “Why... why would she do so? I mean... you have all dedicated so many years to -”

“She did not have the power to do so before.” Abelas said calmly.

“Oh.”

Of course, she had not been fully herself. Flemeth had held all that remained of her after Elgar'nan and the others had murdered her and it had taken Mythal centuries, if not a thousand years to get to her.

“Although...” I paused, thinking. “If that is the case then why are you _here_? _”_

If he had been released from his vow to Mythal then he owed me nothing. Not even if I was the last to drink from the well, it was Mythal that was the lynch pin for that.

“I believe you know the answer to that already.”

I stared at him, trying to think of what he meant.

I recalled that he had sworn in Solas' Keep that he would help me as Mythal had instructed all of her Sentinels and that he had protected me with his life from those that had tried to capture me there. He had been willing to give his life to save mine.

There was nothing that came to mind that should have explained it but then there was that sense of his presence and something seemed to click.

I had only ever really felt the presence of others like this with two others. Mythal and Solas. Those times had been different, more like they were a force at the back of my mind and being. This was more like the feeling I had gotten from the prayer in the fade but it was not a whisper. It was like a flickering light, a sense of light that radiated in _my_ colour.

That sense of mine was more then a little bit weird.

“You didn't...?” I questioned, my eyes wide as I stared at him. “Abelas, did you swear an oath to me as I slept?”

“Yes.”

_Oh Creators._

I stared at him. He was no longer Mythal's Sentinel, he had become mine.

“Why?” I questioned, trying to figure out why he would swear to me as he had done Mythal.

“You needed someone to guard you.” He said with a small shrug of his shoulders. “The other Sentinels were returning to uthenera or finding new homes out in the world. Without Fen'Harel, you were defenceless.”

“So you decided on your own to oath yourself to me?” I stammered.

I did not want to be seen as anything other then a normal person but here was one of the strongest Sentinels flat out telling me that he had sworn himself to me while I slept.

His oath, someone else's prayer. I really did not like how this was playing out. I may have used the idea of being an ancient goddess to psyche myself up but I did not want that or the responsibilities that came with it.

“Yes.” He responded again. “I would give my oath again to you now that you were awake.”

“Abelas, I don't... I don't want that.” I said with a grimace, trying to be polite but I still felt groggy.

“I know.” He flashed teeth with a wide smile. “You don't want to be what the people want you to be, for that reason alone I would be yours. You see it as a responsibility not as a right. Only Mythal and Fen'Harel saw it that way in Elvhenan. I would follow you as I followed them.”

He was referring to the elves as the People. I wondered what had made that change for him.

I hoped it was not me as I had no idea where I fit in the world any more. Not Dalish and not ancient Elvhen.

“What did Mythal think about that?” I asked, almost a little rudely.

“She was surprised.” Abelas said with a strange look that was almost guilty. “I swore before she released us.”

Now that would have been a conversation I would have liked to see. Mythal may have been the kindest of the Evanuris but she could be just as blood thirsty as the rest of them. She had spent thousands of years manipulating events to get to the point of her vengeance.

“You are aware she did not kill Radinan?” I asked the question before I even had time to consider it.

“I am aware she did not kill her adopted son, yes.” Abelas bowed his head. “I... did not agree but she had made that choice.”

There was genuine anger in his voice at Mythal's decision. I did not question that anger but I had the feeling it had less to do with me and more to do with the acts that Radinan had orchestrated over the years.

“Abelas, I... I don't know if I should accept your oath.” I tried to keep my voice as gentle as I could. “I don't want to take away your free will.”

“I understand.” He said, his head still bowed. “But if I may interject?”

I was staring at him again. He was asking me permission to give his opinion.

“Uh... sure.” I mumbled, not really sure how to take that subservient attitude from a man that was probably several hundreds, if not thousands, of years older then me.

“You are about to throw yourself back out into the thick of things.” He lifted his head but there was no emotion in his voice or on his face. Just calm fact being presented. “You are greatly weakened from pulling Mythal through the veil. It will be time before you are even capable of rudimentary magic. By my oath, I can help you. Think of me like a tool to assist until you are well enough on your own.”

“Think of you like a tool...?” I scowled at the wording. “Abelas, that's not really convincing me.”

“Then... wait until you are strong enough to fully release me.” His voice had gone soft. “Allow me the chance to prove that it is helpful to you.”

“And if I decide to release you, you'll go?” I asked.

“Well, I won't go but I will not swear to you again.” Those eyes burned for a moment. “Please. Let this be my purpose.”

I realized that it must have been frightening to him, and perhaps even the other Sentinels, to now be in a world vastly different then Elvhenan and without purpose. If I had to guess, I would say more then half of them returned to uthenera as opposed to facing this world without Mythal or the Well.

“Very well.” I said with a sigh. “Does that mean you're going to remove your vallaslin?”

It was meant as a joke but he did not laugh.

“I think it would be best if I retained the markings of Mythal.” He said simply. “There would be less questions if I have recognizable vallaslin, I may need to pose as a elf of this era.”

The idea of Abelas trying to blend in with the Dalish or City elves was beyond hilarious. I did not have the heart to tell him that he carried himself far differently then any of the other elves in Thedas. Instead, I knew I was going to have to humour him.

“That makes sense.” I said finally.

I moved to slide out of the bed and he reached forward to help me again. Almost leaping out of the chair he had been sitting on.

“Slowly.” He cautioned. “It takes time for your body to readjust.”

“I was only in uthenera for a year.”

“Even so, your soul completely left your body to wander the fade.”

“That's what uthenera is?” I asked, startled as I pushed myself into standing.

My legs felt weak and I was certain my knees were shaking. We had no stories for what uthenera truly was. It had been something lost when the elves had become mortal for there had no longer been a need to find something to do with the endless years of immortality.

Something heavy slid down my front and I ended up looking down to see Solas' wolf jawbone necklace hanging there. The crystal from Dorian was next to it but the jawbone was what held my attention and I held my breath as I just stared at it.

“He would have wanted you to have it.” Abelas said quietly before he quickly jumped back to the topic of uthenera. “Yes, when you enter uthenera, you separate from your body completely. It is different then simply dreaming and why your body cannot be left unprotected.”

I grimaced but focused on what he was explaining instead of the necklace. It felt heavier then I remembered but I had never actually worn the thing.

“Is that why some elvhen died in uthenera?” I asked as I took a step, the gown swishing around my ankles.

“Some, yes.” Abelas responded. He did not try to hold me steady, merely stood close enough that I had something to lean on should my legs give way. “The temptation to just wander takes them away from the physical world. Their body withers away and then they can never return to it.”

“That doesn't sound pleasant.”

“It is not.” Abelas admitted.

I wondered if there had been Sentinels who had slipped away like that over the centuries.

“Abelas, do you know what is happening outside the temple?” I asked instead.

“I do not.” He answered. “My duty has been here, watching over you.”

“Where are we, exactly?”

“We are in the land that is called the Free Marches.” He used the modern word for it, no doubt for my ease.

“Free Marches?” I asked before thinking out loud. “I need to get back to Skyhold, and Varric should be in Kirkwall. We will need to go there.”

He said nothing, merely followed me around the room as I fought the stiffness of my legs.

“Well, do you have any opinion on that?” I questioned.

“I serve.” He said with a shrug. “If you decide we are going to Kirkwall, then we are going to Kirkwall.”

I groaned before turning to look at him fully. I put on my best 'in charge' face and spoke.

“Alright, starting off.” I took a deep breath. “If you're going to swear to me. I don't want a mindless follower. I want your opinion on things. Creators knows if I make a bad decision, I want you to tell me before I go ahead with it.”

He quirked an eyebrow at me, looking almost surprised.

“You have thousands of years of experience and knowledge, Abelas. I have... twenty years.”

I had less then ten years of experience when I became Inquisitor, I had only been First for a few short years and I had only just been out of my teens. Thinking back now, I wondered how they ever thought that was a good idea for me to lead. All I had was the anchor and yet they had been willing to follow me, and still willing apparently.

“You will not take offence if I question your decision making?” He asked softly.

“Void no.” I answered. “I value your opinion.”

“Then would it be wrong of me to state you should rest for at least several days before you attempt to venture to the city of Kirkwall?”

“No.” I responded. “You're given leave to question what I do, doesn't mean I'm going to agree to it.”

“That does not seem practical.”

“I will take it under advice. A day to get my legs working normally again?” I posed.

“Very well.” He sounded a little awkward as if he truly had not expected me to even take his suggestion into account.


	5. Reasons

It ended up being more then a day before we set out for Kirkwall. Abelas refused to let me do much but then it seemed that he was not the only one with that intention.

It appeared that the temple housed more then just Abelas and myself. The same elf came every day, bringing me something to eat. They did not speak, just respectfully placed the food on a nearby table. I had not even noticed the first few times.

“They were once followers of Fen'Harel.” Abelas had explained when one of them had delivered new riding clothes for me.

Clothing that finely tailored and fitting perfectly – which was a little weird as it meant they had measured me while I slept and I was not completely sure I was alright with that. The clothing was closer to what I would have worn if I had been raised a city elf but there were a few pieces that almost looked like they might belong to a Keeper.

I sincerely hoped that was not how they saw me.

“They all swore to help care for you as you slept.” Abelas continued. “Although none of them expected that you would wake during their lifetime.”

_Their lifetime._

The elves here had expected me to remain in uthenera for decades at least. Abelas had clearly thought the same. It put my injuries in a bit better perspective. How much damage had I done to myself by ripping open a hole in the veil?

“So what? They just swore themselves to me and then their kids?” I asked, even more disturbed by the idea that they had simply sworn their family line to a woman they did not even know, or assumed would never wake.

“Yes.” Abelas had answered simply as he led the way to our horses. “They will remain here and watch over this temple. It is their home now.”

I said nothing as I watched the elves hurry away from us. The more I watched them, the more it seemed like they were avoiding me. They would avert their eyes downward if they caught me looking at them.

“Are they afraid of me?” I finally asked, looking over at Abelas with a small frown.

“It is nothing to be concerned about.” Abelas said as he waved my question away.

It was as good as him saying yes. These elves were afraid of me, yet they had all come here for the single purpose of protecting me. My frown deepened as I thought about it.

“Do not trouble yourself, ma tarlan.” Abelas said with a small shake of his head. “It is not fear that they feel towards you. They are more in awe then fearful of you.”

I quirked an eyebrow at him.

“As I mentioned before, you are not as they are. Even weakened, they can sense the difference in you.”

“They can sense me?” I stared at him. I had never recalled anything like that from my time with Clan Lavellan, not for all my training with them. My time in Elvhenan had been different, but even then, I hardly sensed another person beyond Fen'Harel.

“Yes.” He said it quickly, almost uncomfortably as if the question bothered him.

“How?”

He shifted awkwardly but I continued to stare at him.

“We who have oathed ourselves to you can -”

“They swore themselves to me too?” I said, cutting him off.

“Yes.” He quickly looked away.

“I take it that was something you were not going to inform me of?” I crossed my arms in a stubborn gesture.

“Their fate is not my concern.”

I glared at him but he seemed not to notice.

I quickly shaded my eyes as we stepped out of the temple proper and into the sunlight. I did not recognize this area but it was beautiful.

It reminded me of Mythal's temple where the well of sorrows had been hidden away but only in the general idea. This temple was well cared for. The overgrowth had been cleared away from some areas, allowing for easier travel, and broken walls had been repaired. I could see a few small huts through the nearby trees but there were gardens between here and there.

A few children even played among the forest trees.

“This... was not what I was expecting.” I answered truthfully. “How long has this place been here?”

“The temple itself has been here since before Arlathan,” Abelas answered as he continued to lead the way. “The newer buildings are within the year.”

They had been here the entire time I had been sleeping.

“How has no one found this place?”

“No one ventures this far into the forest unless they know about the temple. We are very, very deep into the forest here.”

“Not even soldiers from Kirkwall or...” I tried to think of the nearest city besides Varric's home but nothing came to mind. I knew there were others but it had been so long that I simply could not remember.

“Not even soldiers. And the elves here are not without their defences.”

I did not ask about that as I stopped next to the stables. Several elves were gathered there, watching us with wary eyes. A pair of horses was waiting for us. A dappled grey and a brown one.

I visibly flinched as I saw the brown horse.

“I... can't ride that one...” I murmured, taking a step back.

I did not want to think of that night and what had happened to Dennet's brown horse but it seemed like I did not need to.

Abelas merely nodded and one of the elves led the brown horse away. No one looked at me in sympathy or judgement. They simply accepted that I would not ride the brown horse.

I focused instead on looking towards the forest where I could see other people moving about. I could hear the children laughing as they went about their games and it eased some of my apprehension.

I realized then that it had been a long time since I heard someone having fun. There had not been many children at Skyhold when I led the Inquisition, and I could not remember any children around me while I was at Mythal's temple.

It was strange but somehow comforting to find that people were gathered here with their families. Even if they had sworn themselves to me.

“My lady.”

I turned, startled at the voice beside me. An older elf with greying hair tugged a large black horse closer to me. He did not meet my eyes but he did not look away either.

I must have been staring off into the forest for some time as they had managed to saddle the horse up and transfer my things to it.

“Thank you.” I said with a warm smile before moving to mount the horse. The man simply nodded and held the horse before stepping away.

Abelas had already mounted the grey but was patiently waiting for me before he started moving. He nodded towards the old man and then we were on our way.

Once we travelled out of the deep part of this forest, I recognized a little bit of where we were. Once, a very long time ago, Clan Lavellan had travelled near here. Time travel made things seem so weird as it was only about ten years, maybe a little more, since the Clan travelled this way but it was so much longer then that for me. My memories of this place were like half forgotten dreams.

I frowned as we rode, not liking that thought.

“Something troubles you?” Abelas asked. I was not sure if it was concern for me or simply because the silence was wearing on him.

“Just thinking.” I said, glancing over at him. “Clan Lavellan passed through here once.”

I thought to the Clan that had raised me and the fate that had befallen them. I could barely remember the people that had been my family for the first part of my life but I could still remember that decision I had made. The one that had sent them to their deaths.

I had been so new to leading the Inquisition and had trusted the wrong people.

“Did you ever return here?” Abelas continued to question.

“No. This is the first time I have been in this part of Thedas since before the Conclave.”

“Do you miss them?”

“Sometimes.” I admitted. “I can't really remember what they look like. I remember some of the names but I can't remember them.”

There was a knowing look in his eyes. He had lived through losing many of his compatriots in addition to his family.

“Would you like to look for them?” Abelas asked. “The survivors. Surely some have survived the events at Wycome.”

I stared at him for a moment, working through that little tidbit of information. He had said it so easily that I knew it was not something he had picked up from overhearing a conversation.

“You know what happened to my Clan?”

“I know what happened to Clan Lavellan, yes.” He said with a nod.

“How? Why?”

“Mythal informed me of your time with them and then what befell them.”

“Mythal?” I continued to stare at him. “Mythal told you about Clan Lavellan? Why?”

“Despite her choices, Mythal was not a cruel woman.” He turned away, fixating more on the road ahead of us. “She understood that I had made the choice to be your Sentinel and she did wish for you to be protected. She had been watching over you as a child, as much as she was able given that she had a daughter of her own.”

“Morrigan.” I supplied the name.

“Yes, her.” He wrinkled his nose a little. I did not doubt that he was probably still bothered by Morrigan and her actions in Mythal's temple. Especially since he learned that she was Mythal's daughter. “I know much of your childhood among the Dalish and the difficulties you faced.”

“Difficulties?”

“Yes.” Abelas answered, his gaze flicking back towards me. There was a strange look in his eyes that I did not quite understand. Something between mirth and sympathy. “That you were feared by most of the other elves and did not quite make too many friends among them. Your magic displayed at an early age, even for an Elvhen.”

“Really?” I asked, surprised. “I knew I was early for the Dalish but I didn't think I was...”

“You were.” He said as I trailed off. “Most children demonstrate the smaller things at around six or seven, you apparently lit the Keeper's aravel on fire when you were four.”

I did not remember the event but I knew I had been young when I did something bad. That was all I really got from the adults of the Clan, none of them wanting to really explain it to me.

“Mythal began to teach you shortly after that.” Abelas continued. “Your natural magical ability is possibly why you survived the anchor without too much trouble.”

I looked down at the crystalline hand and I could feel the crackle of energy there. The magic that had once been Solas' but was now solely mine. It hurt a little as I thought of Solas but I pushed that thought to the side. Now was not the time for that.

“What would have happened if I had not been Elvhen?” I asked.

“At best, you would have survived and been in near constant pain.” He did not say what would have been the worst case scenario as I had a good idea of what that would be.

I recalled the moments when the anchor had almost consumed me. The pain had seared that memory in my mind and despite the years passing, I could remember how it felt as my arm had begun to disintegrate beneath the power of the anchor.

“Do you think Solas was right, that I will survive if the veil comes down?”

“Yes.” He answered honestly. “You are not like the elves of this age. You never were. Even with the veil, you're more then they are. Far more.”

I grimaced at the thought and fell into silence. I did not want to consider the fact that I was nothing like the people I had grown up with. Everything had always been different, I had just never really paid enough attention to it. From the magic I used to how quickly I learned, I was always different.

“Fen'Harel never noticed as his own magic impeded his ability to sense what you were.” Abelas answered a question I had not even considered. “He would have realized it but you were taken into the past before he could.”

“What do you think would have happened if he had realized that while he was a part of the Inquisition?” I asked, curious about the idea.

“That, I cannot say.” Abelas said as he shrugged his shoulders. “What may or may not have happened is nothing to really consider when you have to focus on the now.”

“True.” I admitted softly. It was just another what if that I should put to the back of my mind.

We rode in silence again and I focused on what I was expecting to find at Skyhold when we arrived. Cassandra had taken the reigns of the Inquisition and I was definitely okay with that but people still saw me as the figurehead, as the one who had saved the world twice over.

“Ethara?” Dorian's voice suddenly called from the crystal and I jerked upwards.

I had not felt the pulse of magic as the crystal woke.

“Remember, you are weakened, ma tarlan.” Abelas said without even so much as a smile.

“Ethara?” Dorian called again.

“I'm here!” I answered, picking up the crystal in my hand to bring it closer to my mouth.

“Oh, thank the maker.” He sounded relieved and not quite like his usual self.

“It's good to hear you, Dorian.” I said with a small laugh.

“I wasn't imagining things, you were in my dream, yes?”

“I was.” I answered. “And I remember the things you said.”

“Good, that makes things a lot easier. Where are you?'

“Free Marches.” I responded. “I'm on my way to Kirkwall to take a boat to Ferelden.”

“The Free Marches?” He said in surprise before quickly shifting the topic away from that. “The Sentinels brought you all the way to the Free Marches?”

“Apparently.” I said with a small chuckle. “Maybe I should head north and just go to Tevinter.”

“That would not be wise.” Dorian said at nearly the same time as Abelas.

“Why not?” I asked.

“You may be the Inquisitor, but you're still an elf.” Dorian explained. “Elves are not treated kindly here and I would hate to have my favourite elf treated poorly.”

Abelas scowled but said nothing, letting Dorian explain his reason for not wanting me to go to Tevinter on my own. I had the feeling that he had a completely different reason from Dorian's.

“No one would take you seriously as the Inquisitor unless you showed up with your entourage. Plus there have been some that have begun discrediting an elf as their saviour. Especially with Cassandra having taken on the role in your absence.” Dorian continued. “You need to be seen in that role before you come north.”

“Well, thanks for the advice on that.” I responded. It made sense, I did not agree with it but it made sense. “You'll be alright there, right?”

“Of course.” I could almost picture the look on his face as he said it. “You get back to Skyhold safely and then you can worry about coming to rescue me from these dreadful politics.”

There was a small strained laugh on the other end of the crystal and I knew that he was tired. The dream had been proof of that. I worried about him but I knew he would just brush the concern away with some quip or other.

“Yes, and then I'll ride in from the sunset on a glowing Hart -”

Abelas pulled his mount in front of mine before bringing them both to a quick but jarring stop. I nearly fell out of my saddle and looked over at him with a questioning look.

“Someone is up ahead.” His voice was cautious but he was already drawing his sword.

“Who's that?” Dorian asked across the crystal. “That doesn't sound like Solas.”

“Hold on Dorian.” I said to the crystal.

“What is it?” He questioned.

“Nothing, just give us a second, would you?”

Out of the trees came a trio of brigands. They were dressed in leather armour that had most definitely seen better days. The one at the front fixed his gaze on Abelas, sizing him up.

“That's some pretty nice armour, knife ears.” He said with a lopsided grin.

Abelas just stared the man down.

“We don't want any trouble.” I said softly.

“A knife ear who thinks she's a lady, that's hilarious.” The man's eyes darted over to me and that look was nearly covetous as they travelled over my body in a lecherous manner. I scowled in response.

“You look at me like that again and you'll regret it.” The softness fled from my voice as I stared him down like Abelas was doing. I did my best Inquisitor voice that I could manage. “I said we don't want any trouble so you best be on your way.”

“Fraid not.” The man said with a shrug. “You've got horses, nice gear and probably supplies in them saddle bags. Much too good for a pair of knife ears.”

I huffed in irritation even as I went to pull my magic towards myself but felt only the barest glimmer of power. It was different then when I had been cut off as this was more like the pool of my magic had shrunk to a mere puddle.

I had expected to be physically weak but to be without my magic was something completely beyond the norm. It was almost frightening to consider what that might mean for me if I encountered someone who actually could kill me.

“Ma tarlan.” Abelas cautioned. “I will handle this.”

I scowled over at him instead of the bandits. He was clearly aware of my situation. Now his offer to be my sentinel made perfect sense.

“As she has stated, we do not want any trouble.” Abelas said, his eyes still on the bandits before sliding off the horse.

“What? You think we're gonna fight you?” The bandit leader laughed. “My man Henry is good with a bow. You make another move and we'll put an arrow through the woman's eye.”

I quickly scanned the tree line and made out the faint glint in the distance. Not far enough to make the shot difficult but enough that Abelas would not make it in time to stop an arrow from being fired.

I felt the barrier sliding around me and my scowl turned into a look of surprise. I had known he was capable of magic but it was another thing to see and feel it. The barrier was very much like the magic that Mythal had taught me. Tightly crafted to better protect.

Abelas moved just as that barrier came up around me, his blade held out as he prepared for the men to attack.

The bandit leader raised his hand and let it fall. A clear signal as an arrow suddenly flew out of the woods.

Reflex had me squeezing my eyes shut but the arrow bounced harmlessly off the barrier. I peeked open an eye to watch Abelas and held my breath for a moment.

His skill in combat was evident. He was probably the most proficient person I had ever seen in a sword fight but then there was his magic. It allowed him to dart across the ground in the blink of an eye. Slicing as he went. There was a brief moment when I thought of the memories that I had seen in the Fade. Of other Sentinels protecting the temples of their chosen Evanuris.

His style was much the same. I wondered how many years had he dedicated to simply learning to fight.

_A decade? A century? More?_

He was silent the entire time. Not a word as he cut down the bandits who had been willing to kill the two of us. The bandits had a few moments of shock before they were sent on to the next world.

It was only when there was a single one standing that I regained my wits to shout out.

“Stop!” I shouted as Abelas was about to swing his sword.

He halted, the blade mere inches from the bandit's neck. The bandit squeaked in fear, dropping his own weapon and staring at the elf who had seemingly materialized out of nothing. He had moved so effortlessly across the field of battle that it must have seemed like a nightmare made real.

I slid from my horse and approached. I could see that the weapons and armour were far more battered then I thought they had been. It was hardly the calibre of a successful group of bandits. More like thieves who had simply found what they could.

“As you wish, ma tarlan.” Abelas said with a bow and took a step back from the bandit. It was only respect for me that he stayed his hand. Otherwise this man would have been dead at his hands.

I walked over and looked at the bandit. He could have been no more then a child. Perhaps a teenager. His eyes were wide with terror as he just stared at Abelas.

I could understand that terror. Elf or not, if something like Abelas had approached me back before I joined the Inquisition, I would have been terrified.

“What's your name?” I asked the young bandit.

“Please don't kill me!” He pleaded as he dropped to his knees and covered his head with his hands.

“We're not going to kill you.” I said with a sigh.

“Then... then I can go?” He looked up at me through splayed fingers.

“Yes -” I went to speak further but the boy was up and running.

I was startled by how quickly he darted off into the woods but little could be said as the young man did what he could to lengthen the distance between him and us.

I looked over to find Abelas watching him go even though it was clear he could have easily caught up to him and ended his life like he had done the others.

“You should have let me kill him.” Abelas said simply.

“He was no more then a boy.” I responded sadly.

“A boy on his own who will most likely starve.” Abelas said with a shrug before walking back towards the horses. “If other bandits don't get to him first.”

“It did not feel right.” I stubbornly responded, my eyes still glued in the direction the boy had run off. Part of me wanted to follow, to try and help him like I had before but I had to get to Kirkwall. I had to get to back to my friends.

Abelas was once more at my side with the horses, pulling mine to stand near me so I could easily climb onto the horse's back.

“It is time to continue on, ma tarlan.” He said softly before climbing back into his horse's saddle.

I did not question nor did I look at the men on the ground. I simply mounted up and turned the horse in the direction we had been travelling. I thought about burning them but I did not think I had the energy to even summon a little fire.

Once I would have found a problem with killing these men so easily but I had dealt with so many people killing me that it was now just the simple practicality of it. They were enemies who would have easily seen me dead. They may have had their reasons for it but it was nothing to be done about it now.

These men were dead and their youngest member was now alone in the wilds.

“Why would you choose to save the one and not the others?” Abelas questioned as the horses slowly walked along the well worn trail.

“He was just a boy,” I responded, repeating what I had said earlier. “They were most likely driven from their homes with the conflict happening around Thedas. Had I the sense, I would have stopped you sooner.”

“You would save the lives of those who would try to kill you?”

“Some people are just stuck in a shitty situation.” I glanced over at him with a small shrug. “What's to say these men didn't have families they were trying to take care of?”

“Then they should have become hunters.” Abelas responded flatly.

“And what of you and the other Sentinels? Did you not kill any who came near Mythal's temple?” I challenged.

“They were interlopers.” Abelas' eyes blazed angrily at me. “They invaded the temple and killed those of us that remained.”

Sighing, I urged my horse on. We rode in silence again for several minutes. Quickly putting the small glade behind us. I really did not want to think further about his willingness to kill the men as it had mirrored my own thoughts.

“Why didn't I sense the crystal activating?” I finally asked. “And why couldn't I perform a spell?”

“You're weakened.” He answered as if that should have been the end of it. The look on my face had him continuing quickly. “Your senses are dulled both from waking from uthenera and how much power you put forward for Mythal.”

“But what of... what of what Solas gave me?”

“Even with that, you were not prepared for physically pulling someone through the veil.” He responded quickly as if he did not want to answer that question completely.

“What exactly happened to me when I did that then?”

“I don't fully understand it.” There was honesty in his voice but he did not quite look at me. Still hiding something. “What I do know is that you pushed a part of yourself into the fade and pulled Mythal through. For a brief moment, you were touching the actual fade. The true fade.”

I went slack for a moment as I heard what he said. I had touched the fade. I had understood full well that I had made Mythal real but I had not realized exactly the full extent of what I was capable of. There were other things on the other side of the veil that would no doubt be as dangerous to pull free. I refused to let myself consider what those were.

“Oh...”

“Precisely.” Abelas responded. “Your foci can channel your power and allow you to access the fade in a way no other mage in this era can.”

I had not considered my power working like that in such a manner and I stared down at my crystalline hand. It flickered with that rainbow of colours and my stomach suddenly sank as I considered my foci. A key through the very veil itself.

“Abelas... can the other foci do that?” My voice was quiet as I asked. “Can they bypass the veil?”

“Yes, if they are properly unlocked and activated.” He answered. “You know what happened when Corypheus attempted to unlock Fen'Harel's orb, it would require something of equivalent power to do the same and even then, the person wielding it would have to be powerful.”

“What of Mythal? Would she be capable of opening another?”

“That... that is possible.” He frowned, as if he had clearly just thought of that. “I do not believe she would. She has no need of such power, not from how you pulled her through.”

“But she could.”

“Yes, she could.”


	6. Kirkwall

The travel to Kirkwall went quicker then I thought.

Abelas rarely let me keep watch and my nights were filled with strange dreams. Solas visited almost every night but the dreams were weirder on the nights he did not arrive as if he was keeping the stranger parts of the fade at bay.

One particular dream had been about the hall where Radinan had held me captive or at least I believed it was that place. The ceiling was completely gone and there were always stars overhead as if I was looking into the night sky. The place was stripped clean of anything that hinted at people. No chairs, no tables, nothing.

The spirits were there, or at least it looked like them. They were in the guise of demons with the Desire demon always the one who came to talk to me. Each and every time, I woke up before anything could be said.

Both Abelas and Solas believed they were trying to tell me something but their grip on the fade was tenuous at best. They had been changed too much by stepping through the rift I made.

It was just another thing added to the long list of things I had to fix.

I was still thinking over it all when we arrived at the gates of Kirkwall.

I could barely remember what the city looked like but it was a lot less friendly looking then what I could remember. We could see the giant statues as we approached, rising into the sky like fearsome protectors. I had no idea why Varric wanted to live in a place like this but then, people called the strangest places home.

“ _I do not like this place_.” Abelas voiced his concern in ancient Elvhen as we approached. He quickly went silent as we neared others walking on the road.

I nodded in agreement to him but said nothing as I led the way into the city proper. There were guards but no one stopped us from entering.

It was just as one would expect of a large city. People everywhere. Beggars, merchants, guards, and everything in between. It bustled with life and energy.

Occasionally, someone would glance towards Abelas but otherwise ignored me. His armour did stand out quite a bit compared to what everyone else was wearing. I realized I would have to find something less ancient Elvhen for him if he truly did want to attempt to fit in with the people when he needed to.

We stayed close as we went through the throngs of people and I tried to remember where Varric would be in all of this. It had been years since I had seen him last and I simply could not remember where he would be.

The press of people around me made it harder for me to think. Their voices rising in a cacophony of noise made the hair on the back of my neck stand up on end. I took a deep breath, trying to calm myself but it was hard. I had not encountered this many people in years. There had been far less at Solas' keep and they had all parted for me to pass.

“We will need directions, I think.” I said over my shoulder to Abelas who nodded in agreement.

Forcing our way through the crowd, we managed to get off the main street. I realized then that Abelas was frowning at me.

“ _What is it_?” I asked in ancient Elvhen.

“ _Rest here. I will find information._ ”

I scowled but he was quickly on his way back out into the group of people before I could say a word.

People still moved about the side street but it was a relief not to have someone jostling my horse every few seconds. I gently stroked the creature's neck and I was just glad the creature was far calmer in the crowd then I was. I did not even want to consider what it would be like to wander through here with a skittish horse.

I stopped petting the horse when I felt something beside me. It was almost like a sudden increase in heat next to me but it also flickered, like a candle.

“I told Varric you are here.” Cole's voice came from between the horse and the wall.

He looked almost human as he stood there. That big hat shadowing his face as he kept to the shadows.

“Cole!” I said with a smile before sliding off the horse to give the spirit a hug which he awkwardly returned. “It is good to see you, Cole.”

He felt as real as any other person but I knew better.

“You are tired.” Cole said with a tilt of his head.

“It's nothing.” I shook my head and tried to alleviate his concerns. “Just...”

“Not used to the people.” Cole finished for me. “Big. So many people. Hard to think.”

“Yes, well. I haven't really been in large crowds without something bad happening.”

“Nothing bad will happen. He will protect you.”

“I don't want people to protect me, Cole.” I wrinkled my nose.

“I know.” Cole bobbed his head. “You are strong, but he sees. He knows. Endless sleep, endless dreams.”

“Abelas won't let me do much on my own.” I said with a small laugh.

“Abelas...?” Cole cocked his head. “Oh yes. He sees too. Not as much but he sees.”

I blinked, realizing that the first he was not Abelas. I had the feeling that he was referring to Solas but I was not entirely sure about that.

“Cole?” I questioned.

“Ah, there you are.” A voice from down the side street had me glancing over the horse towards a group of town guards walking in my direction.

Out of the corner of my eye, I could see that Cole had vanished once more. Sighing, I stepped from around the horse to get a better look at the people approaching.

The speaker was a woman with red hair and a uniform that clearly marked her as being the leader of the group of guards.

“My apologies, Lady Lavellan, we were only just made aware of your arrival.” Something about the way she carried herself almost reminded me of Cullen. Almost like she was being crushed by a sense of duty but yet loved every moment of it.

“Ethara is fine.” I responded, wrinkling up my nose.

“Ethara.” A small smile cracked the stern line of her face. “I am Guard Captain Aveline, Varric sent me to fetch you.”

“Oh... you're _that_ Aveline.” I stared at her.

Strangely, the Tale of the Champion was one of the things that I could remember clearly. Perhaps because I had read it so many times. Seeing Aveline here was a bit surprising.

“I thought you left Kirkwall after the Chantry -” I continued.

“Don't believe everything you read in Varric's books.” Aveline said with a small laugh, cutting me off before I continued. “I remained in Kirkwall after Hawke and the others were forced to flee.”

“Well, pleasure to meet you, Miss Aveline.”

“If I'm to call you Ethara, you may call me Aveline.” She said with a small nod before gesturing to my horse. “If you'd mount back up, we'll lead you to the Keep.”

“Certainly but I need to wait for my companion to come back.” I responded as I climbed back into the saddle. “He went to ask about where Varric would be.”

Aveline flashed me a strange look, like she was about to question that but thought better of it. She nodded over towards two of the guards before speaking to me.

“What would he look like?”

I did my best to give a description of Abelas, from the horse to the armour. The guards quickly made themselves scarce as they followed her orders to seek him out.

“There, they will inform your friend where you can be found. Varric was fairly insistent that I get you up to the Keep as soon as possible.” Aveline motioned for me to follow.

I thought about it. About refusing and just waiting there for Abelas to return but there seemed to be a sincerity about the woman that made me want to go with her.

I also had the sneaking suspicion that Cole had informed Varric that I was drained.

I turned the horse in her direction and urged it forward. The guards all fell in step near the horse with Aveline walking just ahead of me.

She led us through the streets, keeping to the back ways instead of the main streets. I eyed her back suspiciously until we came out in front of a set of stairs leading up to a rather large building. There were more of those statues but it looked like they had gone through some effort to at least make it look friendlier.

“You'll need to leave your horse here, I'm afraid.” Aveline said as a guard stepped forward to take the reins of my horse. I must have looked startled as Aveline quickly spoke again. “Don't worry, nothing will happen to the horse and there are plenty of guards here. You'll be alright. Varric's offices will be up the stairs to the left once you enter the Keep.”

I shot her a questioning look before climbing off the horse.

She merely smiled and beckoned for me to continue on my way. I was not quick enough to ask as she had turned to speak to another nearby guard, clearly giving him instructions about my horse and general guard behaviour.

Sighing, I climbed up the stairs on my own and entered the building.

I remembered what Solas' Keep had been like, teeming full of elves, but this was completely different. It was full of people from all the races of Thedas. Elves, humans, dwarves, even a qunari or two. They were all chattering away at one another, some louder then others.

Guards stood along the walls and at the foot of the stairs.

It seems the city had done alright since the days of the Champion. I would never believe it if someone told me that the Qunari had ransacked the Keep. The damage was almost nonexistent at this point.

I straightened myself as I walked. My head held high like the Inquisitor I was supposed to be.

Thankfully, no one really cared about the lone elf walking up the stairs towards the Seneschal's office. I was only stopped by the guard standing at the door.

“State your business.” His tone was gruff and his gaze was harsh.

“I'm here to see Varric Tethras.”

“You and every other person.” His voice became downright dismissive.

“He's expecting me.” I said with a shrug. Caution had me keeping my name to myself, given that Cassandra was supposed to be impersonating the Inquisitor in the South.

He stared at me but did not move.

“Just go tell Varric that his expected guest is here.”

The guard next to him just rolled his eyes before stepping into the room. I had no idea whether he was irritated with me or his fellow guardsman.

I could not really see much through the small crack, nor could I really hear anything.

The other guard came out shortly before nodding to me.

“You can go in.” He said simply.

I stepped between them and through the door but I could hear the first guard complaining to the other. I tuned him out as I shut the door behind me.

I turned around and found myself caught in an almost rib crushing hug from Varric.

“It's damn good to see you.”

I returned the hug even as I felt a little teary eyed. I had only seen Solas, Cole and Bull since I returned from behind the veil. The full weight of that hitting me like a blow.

“Hey now!” Varric said, a small chuckle coming from the dwarf. “No crying. If you start, then I'll start and that will just be terrible.”

“It is good to see you, Varric.” I said, giving him another little squeeze before letting him go.

“Come on, sit down.” He stepped away and motioned towards the desk on the other side of the room.

The papers were piled high beside a quill that looked like it had been used quite often. Two chairs were situated around it, one clearly having been moved from the other side of the desk.

I quickly glanced around the room as I walked over. A window to let in light, a small fireplace, a lot of shelves full of books and parchments. It looked every inch the room of a Lord.

“I forgot that you had taken over Kirkwall.” I smiled as I sat in the chair.

“Yeah, Dorian told us about you being through time and stuck behind the veil.” He grimaced a little as he sank into the opposing chair. “That must have been hell of a thing. How did you manage to get out?”

“The Breach tore holes in the veil,” I answered, knowing that he meant my imprisonment in the fade. “It took a while before I was brave enough to try going near one of the little rifts but I managed to get through one. Remember that rift we closed that had no demons around it?”

“I thought that had been a little strange.” He chuckled. “That was you on your way out?”

“I didn't quite mean to but yes, that was me.”

“Took out a full rift worth of demons by yourself, getting quite powerful kiddo.”

“You do realize I'm now thousands of years older then you, right?” I could not help but smile at him.

Varric had always been one of those guys that you could not help but laugh and smile with. Sure, he was capable of some pretty large lies but he was not cruel or evil. Every lie he had said had always been for a good reason, or at least the ones I knew he had said.

“Let's not think too hard on that.” He shook his head with a grimace. “At least not until I'm good and drunk.”

“If we had the time to get you that drunk...” I laughed.

“Right, problems in Thedas.” That grimace deepened. “That's why you're here, isn't it? Dorian said something about the elves taking you to spend time in uthenera.”

“Yes,” I stopped laughing. “Apparently I overstepped my skills a little and needed to rest. Dorian managed to pass on the message that things were going badly but he was really, really out of it.”

“I imagine he's mentioned the war in Tevinter then?” Varric said with a quirk of his head. I nodded and so he continued. “We've had an influx of people fleeing the conflict, a lot more elves coming south then staying there.”

“I thought they had a community in the Arlathan Forest?”

“They do but the refugees coming south? Those are kids. Old people.” He sighed. “They wouldn't admit it but they're all the ones the others sent south to keep safe.”

I stared at him in surprise. This Myal in the north was sending away all those who could not defend themselves. That meant they had to be gearing themselves up for battle. There was no other reason why they would do such a thing.

“Do you know that for certain?” I found myself asking.

“Yes.” Varric nodded. “They won't talk to my people but they will talk to the Sabrae Clan.”

“The Sabrae Clan?” The name was familiar but I just could not place them.

“Dalish elves that live just outside Kirkwall. I can arrange for you to meet with their Keeper.” He paused for a moment, thinking about that. “Actually, I probably should do that anyway. She'll be pretty upset that I didn't bring you to visit her if you left without going.”

“You're on good terms with the Keeper of a Dalish clan?”

I was a little sceptical of that. Varric was a friendly man but the Dalish were not that keen on outsiders, especially ones that were not elves and generally not with the people ruling cities. Clan Lavellan had been different but that difference had cost them their lives.

“Of course. It's my old friend Merrill.” He said with a grin that reached ear to ear.

“That's the one from the book?” I asked although I was a little surprised. If I remembered the story right, she had attempted to make a deal with a demon which had ended badly. I really could not remember how terrible but just that it had been bad.

“Yes and I know what you're thinking.” His eyes twinkled. “After the destruction of the chantry, there was a lot of problems here in Kirkwall and with the elves. Merrill is the one who pulled them all together. Dalish and city elves. Things aren't the same here as they are elsewhere, elves aren't as hated because of the things her and Carver pulled off.”

“Her and Carver?”

“Ah yeah, left that out too.” A slightly sheepish look. I assumed it was just another thing he left out of the book as I had no idea about this Carver. “Carver Hawke has pretty much been by her side ever since they left Kirkwall. He's pretty accepted by the elves in the clan as well.”

I did not believe that. There was accepting that the Clan was more like Clan Lavellan and friendlier with outsiders but to have an actual human in the Clan and tied to the Keeper. That was just a little too unbelievable.

I suppose being related to the Champion of Kirkwall might have helped a little with it but it was still surprising.

“Trust me. It's the truth. Clan Sabrae has taken in a lot more then just Carver when it comes to humans.” He was back to smiling again. “They've even taken in some elf blooded kids. It's mostly elves there but they seemed to take after a particular elf that decided to save the world regardless of what everyone else thought of her.”

I felt a blush creeping all the way to the tips of my ears.

“You made an impact, even here. Especially since I was walking proof.” He shrugged before getting up. “After the Chantry, you doing all that was what people needed to realize that if we all don't work together, things were never going to change. Merrill started that change here by rounding up Clan Sabrae and anyone else who needed a home.”

“I definitely need to meet this Merrill then.” I nodded with a smile even though I sincerely hoped that he had not been promoting me as someone larger then life to them.

“You'll also be pleased to know that there are survivors of Clan Lavellan there as well.”

“Really?” That was a pleasant surprise. “I thought they were all up near... “ I paused, not quite remembering the name of the other city.

“Wycome.” Varric provided with a look of sympathy but it was clear that gave him an opening to something that was bothering him. “Look... I know it's not a question you've really been thinking about... but how much do you actually remember?”

“What? Why?”

“Dorian said that you were gone for thousands of years. I can hardly remember things from a few years ago if it's not written down.”

“I can remember enough.” I did not meet his eyes. “I remember the Inquisition, I remember my friends and most of the important stuff.”

“Ethara...”

“It's not a big deal, Varric.” I sighed. “I was only the Inquisitor for what...? Five years? Prior to that, I was just trained to be the next Keeper of Clan Lavellan. I ended up spending more time in Elvhenan then at either of those.”

“Still, it's not something to dismiss. Especially if you're going to be jumping head first back into politics like the others want.”

“So you know about what's happening with the Inquisition as well?”

“Of course. That and the shitstorm up north.”

“What can you tell me about the leader of the elves in the north?” I asked, only too happy to divert the conversation away from myself.

“Not much. She's a young elf, Dalish and she's promoting you as the goddess of the people. She's apparently capable as a leader as there aren't many complaints from the ones that do come south.”

“That doesn't help much.”

“Well, does it help in knowing that they're not actively searching for something in the forest?” He provided, watching me keenly as he spoke. “They did a few sweeps through a small area and then disappeared into the deeper parts. A few groups of them split off and that's about all we know. If there is something in there that they want, then they know where it is already.”

“That helps. Troubling but helpful.” I admitted.

“You know something?” He quirked an eyebrow as he asked.

“It really was the location of Arlathan.” Was all I said.

I honestly did not know what had happened to the city. I had spent my days with Mythal in her temple outside the city proper before venturing to the Alinuris. I just knew that was where it was.

I guessed Solas knew more about what happened with Arlathan but I did not want to bring that up with him.

“That's what most people assume.” Varric sighed. “There's something else you should be aware of.”

“What's that?”

“Remember those people that kidnapped you?”

“You mean Ellendra and her companions?”

I would always leave it at just that. The less people that knew, the better. Especially given that she had been part of a group of cultists led by my father.

That was a conversation I really did not want to have right now.

“Yeah.” Varric looked away from me as he spoke. “They've been popping up all over Thedas now. Not large numbers but enough that it's clear they're looking for something. My guess is that they're trying to find where you are... or Solas but I'm going with you as they had you prettied up when we got there.”

I frowned and looked down at the glove covering my crystalline hand.

“There are some here in Kirkwall.”

My frown deepened but I did not look up. I knew what Abelas had said earlier, that I was still too weak from what I had done. I was not sure if I would be able to stop the Cultists if they came after me while I was in this particular state.

“Damnit.” I muttered under my breath.

“We've managed to route them out but they come back every few months. Aveline caught one trying to sneak in here while I was out.” He half-laughed, half-snorted as he thought about it. “As if I would keep documents about where you were lying around.”

“That is going to make me getting back to Skyhold a lot more difficult.” I said.

“I'm thinking there might be a way around that.” Varric's voice went thoughtful for a moment.

I glanced over at him to see that he had that expression on his face like he was working things out.

“Merrill might have the answer, that's if Solas didn't completely lock down her eluvian.”

“Merrill has an eluvian?” I sucked in a breath of air, startled by that revelation. I had assumed that either Solas or Morrigan had control of the eluvians. “I thought you wrote that Hawke had destroyed it?”

“That's much better then she repaired it and it did nothing, right?” Varric said with a thin smile. “It's a long shot but if it actually does work, we might be able to get you back through there without having to cross through all of Thedas.”

“So, when do I get to meet this Merrill?” I asked.

“As soon as your chaperone shows up.” Varric said with a laugh. “Cole did say you weren't alone.”

“Oh right... Abelas.” I had not forgotten about him, I had just gotten so distracted with talking with Varric that I had forgotten he was not nearby.

“Not Solas?”

“No.” I answered, not quite looking at him.

“Well, not gonna pry into that one.” He shook his head before laughing again. “You're free to come and go as you please in Kirkwall, my home is your home for as long as you're here. When Abelas shows up, I'll have Aveline take you to meet Merrill.”

“Thanks Varric.” I said with a smile, truthfully meaning it.

We continued to talk for what seemed like hours. He reminded me of what things I had said or done as the Inquisitor and I told him what my life had been like since I disappeared. I did not get into too much detail about the time travel as he clearly said that whole thing gave him a 'headache'.

I began to feel a bit on edge as time wore on.

“I think I should have Aveline look for him.” Varric said, whether it was because he noticed my behaviour or he simply realized that it was far too long.

“Thank you.”

“You get some rest until then.” He said as he got up. One hand motioning to a set of doors leading further into the keep. His personal rooms, I guessed. “No arguing. Go lay down.”

I grumbled but I could not help but deny that I was feeling drained. I knew I could trust Varric and his friends to look for Abelas so I slipped into the other room and fell asleep the moment I laid my head down on the pillow.


	7. Restless Dream

_Sleep came easily and I was pleased to find myself in a familiar grove._

_This was always Solas' first choice when I first entered the fade, even if it had been the place he brought me when he removed my vallaslin all those years ago. I knew now that he had intended to tell me the truth as this was one of his favourite places in modern Thedas._

_He was waiting for me by the water's edge as usual. Hands clasped behind his back as he stared out over the water. I could tell by his posture that he wore his usual thoughtful look. He had stood like that so many times in Skyhold._

_I walked over to him and threaded my arms beneath his before resting my head against his back. His hands slid over my own as we stood there for several long seconds._

“ _You are tired.” There was no accusation in his words._

“ _Just a little.” I admitted._

_I knew he was concerned about me. Here, he could protect my dreaming from nightmares and allow me to rest but he had no reach to the waking world. I wondered if it bothered him but I did not want to ask._

_He turned, wrapping his arms around me before bending to place his forehead against mine. There was a small sigh as he closed his eyes. It almost sounded like a sigh of relief, like my presence was soothing._

“ _I have missed you, vhenan.” His voice was soft. “The fade always seems a little duller when you are not around.”_

“ _Flatterer.” I laughed and leaned up to kiss him. “Although, I would stay longer if you did not keep shooing me awake.”_

“ _You are needed in the waking world.” There was mild annoyance in his voice. Apparently, he did not like the idea of me being awake, not after what I had done in Radinan's hall but I was bound by my duty to my friends. “Otherwise, you would still be in uthenera with me.”_

_I shook my head at him. We both knew why I was awake. Dorian had gone in search of one of us and I was the one who had to answer._

“ _Abelas and I are in Kirkwall now.”_

“ _Then you are a step closer to returning to Skyhold.” He pulled away and the grove behind us changed. It slid easily to the rotunda. His desk, his paintings; just like it always did when we discussed Skyhold. I always wondered if it was him or me that did that and just like always, I never asked._

“ _Yes although, there may be some problems getting there.” I admitted before moving to sit in his chair._

“ _Problems?” He questioned, eyebrows furrowing in concern._

“ _Seems things are not quite so simple in Arlathan Forest.” I then proceeded to tell him everything that Varric had told me. Starting with the information about those coming south and the ones who had been searching for something in the forest. “Is there anything in the Forest I should be concerned about?”_

_He paused as he thought it over. Thousands of years worth of knowledge seemed to be turned over in his mind as he sought an answer._

“ _No.”_

“ _Solas?” I questioned, not liking that simple response._

“ _Truthfully, there should be nothing there.” He stepped closer and leaned against the desk. One hand resting against his chin as he thought. “Arlathan has long since disappeared from that forest. Although the tethering point may remain but I do not believe anyone would be capable of accessing that.”_

“ _Not even me?”_

“ _Well, you could. And perhaps Mythal.” He gave me a terse look. “I doubt either of you would want to. The other end of the tether no longer exists in the waking world.”_

“ _But it does exist in the fade?” I was curious. I had not been in the waking world when Arlathan disappeared and I had no idea what had happened to the city. Not that I had ever truly been there. It was still just a place of legend to me, a forgotten city and nothing more._

“ _Yes.” He nodded. “It would take your power to be able to traverse through the tether and even I do not know what would happen if you tried.”_

_Something told me that I did not want to try. The fade, most likely._

“ _What exactly is this tether?”_

“ _Arlathan was a floating city, held aloft by magic and the belief of the people. As long as the people existed, so did the city.” Solas explained. “The tether is exactly that, a tether. It was attached to the city on one end and the waking world on the other. It kept the city leashed to that point in Thedas and prevented the wishes of the people from changing it further.”_

_I stared at him. That explanation made little sense to me but then all I knew about ancient elvhen architecture were stories handed down by the Dalish Keepers. Mythal had never once bothered covering that particular aspect of elvhen magic._

“ _Remember, magic was different in Elvhenan.” He continued to explain, clearly understanding the look. “Places took on the aspects that people believed, or wished for. Arlathan was perhaps the place that the most people wished and believed in. Spirits and elvhen alike.”_

“ _Are you telling me that Arlathan was worshipped like an Evanuris?” I continued to stare._

“ _In a way, yes.” He nodded as a far off look came across his face. “It was the center of Elvhenan. The pride of our people. No city was it's equal. Not then and not since. It was full of spires of crystal and stone that thrummed with life and magic. I truly wish I had taken you there at least once for you to see it as it was.”_

_I thought it over. The very nature of the city was almost too much to imagine even if I had lived as long as I had. Never had I heard of such a thing but it must have clearly existed or else Solas would not bother with the explanation._

_Of course, he spoke of it with such longing that I wondered if his idea of the place was not tinted by happy memories._

“ _Surely you remember feeling that certain places have a presence?” Solas queried, looking intently at me while he waited for an answer._

_I thought hard about that and most of the places I could think of had all been the more eerie places. The village of Crestwood suddenly came to mind even if I had not visited in thousands of years._

_It had been during the Fifth Blight that the mayor had sacrificed the sick populace of the city to save the rest by unleashing water held back by the dam. Such an act had left a mark on the town, and the very ground upon which the houses sat. Spirits had crossed over, and it had felt like ghosts had lingered among the broken homes._

“ _Like Crestwood.” I could not help but shiver as I thought about it._

“ _You understand then.” He nodded._

“ _A little bit.” I frowned and tried to think of something beyond the creepy village. “I take it that the wishes of the people caused Arlathan to disappear?”_

“ _I assume so.” His frown mirrored my own. “Truthfully, I do not know how Arlathan disappeared. It occurred some time while I was in uthenera.”_

“ _That would have taken a lot of magical power to be able to move the city once the veil was up.”_

“ _It would.” He nodded in agreement. “I believe that is what happened to the mages who remained after the veil was erected.”_

_I said nothing about it as I considered the possibility of that._

_The veil had changed the world. Many who had magic had lost their abilities with the veil was erected. I could not even imagine how they would have reacted to realizing their world had changed so much in a single night._

_Pooling their collective power to transport Arlathan away from the world did not seem like such a far fetched idea._

“ _One thing I know for certain is that they did not survive the trip.” There was no sadness in his voice, only regret and pity._

_He had entered uthenera out of need as his powers had been drained erecting the veil, he must have believed they would remain to help those that held no magic power in the new world he had created. It must have been strange to consider that those beings would simply not wish to be in the waking world any longer._

“ _You are certain of that?” I quirked an eyebrow at him._

“ _I am.” There was a small shrug of his shoulders. “I have visited the city during my wandering. It lays empty.”_

“ _Oh.” I paused, looking up at him in surprise. “Where is it?”_

_I felt a chill go up my spine even as I asked the question like something had blown a cold wind up my back. Like that very knowledge was something my body rebelled at knowing._

“ _When you are stronger, I'll show you.” He smiled thinly at me. “Magic such as that leaves a mark, it is not a place to wander.”_

_I shrugged, trying to get rid of that creepy feeling. There was something about the idea of going to Arlathan that almost seemed repulsive. My skin crawled at the very possibility of walking the city._

“ _Let us change the subject.” He seemed to understand and gently took my hand in his. His thumb trailing over my knuckles in a circular manner. I was not sure if it was done for my comfort or his. “Now that you are in Kirkwall, how do you plan on returning to Skyhold?”_

_He knew full well the answer to that. I had to cross the Waking Sea in order to return to Ferelden or travel far west to reach Orlais. Ferelden was the quicker of the two even if the thought of a ship across the sea was enough to make me feel queasy._

“ _We had intended to take a ship to Denerim but Varric has a friend who may have an eluvian. I'm not sure if it'll work but if it does, then we may be able to cut months off this trip.”_

_My thoughts drifted away from Arlathan and a sense of calm slowly returned. It was subtle and made me wonder if Solas had a hand in that._

“ _An eluvian?” Solas' eyes lit up with curiosity. “I do believe I recall an eluvian near Kirkwall, I was unaware of who had laid claim to it.”_

_I did not ask how he knew about the eluvian._

“ _Her name is Merrill.”_

“ _Ah, the Dalish elvhen from his story about the Champion.” Solas paused thoughtfully before his face lit up with almost childlike glee. “It would indeed be fortuitous for you to meet with her.”_

“ _Why is that?”_

“ _She possesses an arulin'holm.” Solas answered. “It is a tool of June's design, used by those who crafted eluvians.”_

“ _And you think that she will just willingly give it to me?”_

“ _Certainly.” He smiled. “You can reactivate her eluvian and allow her access to the rest.”_

“ _Reactivate?” I stared at him. “You deactivated it on her?”_

_He chuckled before shaking his head in response._

“ _She lacks the ability to activate eluvians. I do not know if she managed to fully repair it but if you have the arulin'holm, you will be able to fully restore it to what it once was. It would be a fair trade, travel across Thedas in exchange for a tool that is useless in her hands.”_

“ _You really want me to get that arulin'holm.” I said with a laugh._

“ _I really want you to finish this and return to uthenera.” He countered. His voice was a mixture of teasing and annoyance. One for me and the other for the situation at hand._

“ _Yes, well, when Varric finds Abelas, I'm going to go meet her.”_

“ _Abelas is not with you?” His smile faded and his tone became serious once more._

“ _No. He went to look for Varric but Varric's guard captain found me instead. I'm at the viscount's keep.”_

“ _Did Abelas not tell you to remain waiting for him?” He scowled at me._

_I could see that look starting. The one that he had worn every time he disapproved of a decision I had made._

_It was irritating._

“ _Solas, I'm not a child.” I managed not to glare at him but my tone was flat._

“ _No, you are not but you are quite weak in the waking world.” The scowl remained but he sighed. “You need Abelas' presence to help you recover.”_

“ _What do you mean?” I asked even if I had already guessed what the answer would be._

“ _He is your Sentinel, you draw strength from him.” He answered tersely. “Like a follower but far more direct.”_

_I gained power from him and he was bound to me._

_It was never going to sit well with me. I did not like having that kind of responsibility. It was different when it was the Inquisition, there were so many others that could put their input towards my decisions._

_This was unsettling to have a person tied so completely to me and relying on my choices to dictate their life._

“ _People have gone to find him, I'm sure he'll show up in no time.” I mumbled._

“ _You could find him far more quickly.” Solas sighed again, the scowl finally fading. The words made it clear he was becoming irritated as he only ever spoke in short sentences like that when he became annoyed with me._

“ _What do you mean?” I parroted the question again._

“ _You can sense his presence.” He said it as if that was explanation enough._

“ _Yes, I know that.” I responded in an annoyed tone._

“ _You can follow that sense to where ever he may be.” Solas finished._

“ _Ah, so like a bloodhound.”_

“ _A strange analogy but yes, like a hound.” Solas shook his head at me before lacing his fingers in mine. “You should wake and seek him out. The sooner you are done with this, the better.”_

“ _Yes well, I don't think that's a good idea.” I grimaced._

“ _Ethara?”_

“ _Varric believes there are cultists in the city.” I tapped the fingers of my free hand on the table as I spoke. “He eliminates them every so often but they always return after a few months.”_

_Solas had gone very still while I talked. His gaze darkening but he said nothing._

“ _He believes they are there because he is there and they think he would lead them to me or you.”_

_The dream of the rotunda had suddenly become very silent. It was strange that I had never considered the sound of it before now but I could tell that it had changed. The normal background sounds had simply just ceased._

“ _Does he know what they truly intend?” Solas finally spoke._

“ _No, I didn't tell him.” I said as I looked up at him._

_It was strange as I could see more then just him standing there. The shadow he cast had changed, growing larger and more fearsome. I was almost certain that it had taken on the appearance of a giant wolf._

_It was unsettling._

“ _Then it is best if you do not.” He said. “The less people who know the true intentions, the better.”_

“ _Did you not explain it to Dorian?”_

“ _I merely stated they wanted you, not what they planned to do once they had you.”_

“ _Ah.” I had never really asked before now but then that made sense. I did not want my friends to know that I was supposed to be the physical form of the abstract form of madness. “Should I be worried?”_

“ _No... not once you are with Abelas.” Solas scowled again. “When you find him again, you are not to leave his side. Not until you are far stronger.”_

_I would have retorted but the look on his face made it clear he was not going to accept any arguments about it. There was anger lurking just beneath that scowl._

_Of course, just because I agreed now did not mean I would have to follow through on it._

“ _I know what you're thinking, vhenan.” The scowl faded as he sighed._

“ _I don't know what you're talking about.” I responded almost sullenly._

“ _You are thinking that you will agree,” He leaned closer, letting go of my hand to trail his fingers against my cheek. “And then do as you wish in the waking world where I cannot scold you.”_

_I scowled at him but said nothing._

“ _Please.” He pleaded. “You must be careful and you must listen. You need Abelas near you, he can protect you where I cannot.”_

_His hand trailed down the side of my face before he lightly gripped my chin and tilted my head up towards him._

“ _I would be lost without you.” He leaned his forehead against mine and closed his eyes._

_There was something about his voice that tugged at my heart. I thought back to my earlier thoughts about where he was stuck here, unable to be near me in the waking world, and I felt a little childish for my earlier attitude._

_It did not excuse his behaviour but I did feel a little terrible about it._

“ _Fine.” I grumbled and caved to his request. “I will stay near Abelas from here on.”_

“ _Good.” His voice had become soft but that shadow behind him had deepened. “I will seek out spirits who will help us deal with the cultists.”_

“ _Alright, that sounds like a good idea.”_

_He leaned closer to press his lips firmly against mine in a kiss before he and the rotunda disappeared into nothingness._


	8. Twisting Streets

I came awake just as easily as I had fallen asleep and I thought perhaps it had just been a Dreamer's trance but the stiffness of my legs made it obvious that I had slept in my riding clothes.

Sighing, I got to my feet from the small cot and did my best to stretch those aching muscles.

I had no idea how long I had slept as there were no windows in this room. I reasoned it was for defensive purposes but it still made the room far darker then I liked.

Veil fire came unbidden to my hand as I stood. It was a simple instinctive reaction to the dark.

I could see well enough without it but I could not help but want the light. Even if it was green and merely the memory of fire, it was comforting. Something that reminded me of days long ago with companions I had not really seen in thousands of years.

I walked to the door to find that Varric was not out in the main room either. I could hear people just beyond the door and extinguished the veil fire as I wandered over.

Life still continued on in the main area of the Keep. I did not recognize any one other then the markings of the city guard. Two happened to be standing just outside the doorway.

They were not the men who had been there earlier so I guessed that I had slept through a shift change.

“Ma'am.” One guard said, bobbing his head towards me in respect.

“Uh... sir.” I said, failing at remembering what I should be calling the guards. “Is Master Tethras around?”

His companion looked at me with a strange look but said nothing, letting the first guard do all the talking.

“He is currently occupied with dealing with the diplomat from Starkhaven.” The guard said without even so much as a hint of a smile. “He left instructions that you weren't to be disturbed.”

“Ah, thank you.” I said with a small frown. “Has anyone been here looking for me?”

I already knew the answer but I figured I would ask any way.

“No Ma'am.” He said as he shook his head.

“Alright.” I thought about remaining there but quickly decided to do what Solas had suggested.

I nodded at the pair of guards and wandered towards the stairs. The silent guard finally spoke about my strange accent but I ignored it. Another thought for another time.

I moved past the people in the crowds, not bothering to look at anyone as I made my way down the stairs and out into the crisp night air.

Once I was standing out there with only a pair of guards nearby, I sighed and tried to focus on that presence I had felt when I first woke up in the temple.

It was a strange thing. I had given it no more thought after that first moment but it had been there all along. A strange warmth that never really seemed to change.

I thought it would be difficult to feel it or even to follow it but it was as easy as breathing. Natural and purely by instinct.

Without so much as a second glance back, I followed where that feeling led.

Through the twisting streets off High Town and then to the shabbier parts of the city. I moved through the city with a purpose and no one seemed to pay me any attention.

Everyone was seemingly preoccupied with their own plans.

I ended up far from the Keep and the road we had taken in, instead, I turned a corner and found myself face to face with a massive tree in the middle of a courtyard.

I stared at the tree and felt a sense of comfort about it even if I could not remember what the purpose behind such a thing was. There were symbols painted along the trunk that seemed reminiscent of Elvhen words but it was hard to really make them out. I did not know if it was time or simply that these people did not know the proper way of writing.

However, it was kind of humorous to realize that the tree was the best looking plant I had seen in this part of the city.

I quickly glanced around but it seemed that no one noticed my staring at the tree. Everyone was preoccupied with their lives just like they were in the rest of the city.

I did notice that there were more elves here, a few even had stalls selling goods that were clearly of elvhen make. A few humans wandered around and at least two dwarves.

“Not what you would expect?” A quiet voice came from behind me.

I turned to find myself looking at a young elvhen woman with light blond hair and all too serious green eyes. She bore no vallaslin but her outfit was more like that of the Dalish and not a city elf. Nothing fancy like a Keeper or First but the weave of the cloth around her legs and arms was clearly Dalish.

“Uh no.” I managed, glancing back over my shoulder at the tree for a moment longer.

“You have never been to an alienage before?” She asked, her head tilting curiously as if that was the most fascinating fact she had discovered recently.

“No to that too.” I gave a small sheepish look. I had not realized that this was the alienage as I could only faintly remember people telling me how dirty and poor alienages were. This place looked hardly like that at all. Varric had said that there had been changes here in Kirkwall, mostly because of this Merrill. “I got turned around from where I meant to go.”

“Where did you mean to go?”

“That's kind of difficult to explain.” I responded with a frown, trying to figure out how to politely remove myself from this conversation. “I'm trying to find a friend of mine.”

“And you don't know where he is?” She asked.

“No, I know where he is, I just don't know how to get there.” My frown deepened. I did not know this woman from every other elf in Kirkwall.

“Keeper Merrill says we should help each other.” The woman gave a small shy smile. “You're a stranger and you're lost.”

She did seem earnest despite the shyness.

“Alright.” I said with a sigh. “Can you show me the way into the lower part of the city?”

“You're already in Low Town.” She said with a sympathetic smile which quickly turned into a frown. “Or do you mean Dark Town? It's not good to go there by yourself, especially not for elves.”

“Yes, Dark Town...” I agreed when she spoke before I caught the rest of it. “What do you mean? It's not good to go there for elves?”

“That's where most of the bad men went after they cleaned up the city.” She seemed to almost think about it.”

“And what does that have to do with elves?” I pushed.

“Well... some of them... they kidnap lone elves. Keeper Merrill has been trying to deal with them but they've gotten a lot smarter.”

“Varric hasn't done anything?” I asked in surprise.

“You know Varric?” Her eyes became even bigger and there was a distinct look of awe in them. “He's tried too but it never lasts. He has Aveline go down every other month but they always come back.”

I kept a calm look on my face even as I considered what Varric had told me earlier and what this woman was telling me now. I wanted to believe there was no connection but I had long since learned that there was no such thing as coincidence.

“Alright, can you show me how to get down there?” I asked.

“You still want to go?” Her voice was a bare whisper.

“Yes. A friend of mine is there.” Or at least I thought he was down there. It felt like he was still in the city but he was definitely not on this _level_ of it.

“Alright, I'll show you but miss... I can't let you go alone.” That look was quickly replaced by a determined one. “Keeper Merrill would be very upset if I didn't at least try to help.”

She did not wait for me to argue, turning on her heel to walk quickly in the direction that I assumed was towards this Dark Town.

I followed after her with another sigh.

As it turns out, we did not have to walk very far from the alienage. If I had only turned back the way I had come and taken a side street, I would have found the way down into Dark Town.

This city was confusing.

“Alright, I should be fine from here.” I said to her with a smile.

She only shook her head at me.

“Really, I don't need your help.”

“Miss, if you couldn't find your way topside, you're not going to find your way down here.” Even if her tone was shy, the words were still direct. “And I will just follow you anyway.”

_Great._

I muttered to myself in ancient elvhen before turning back to the darker streets.

“Fine.” I said with a shrug. I would pretend indifference but I was going to keep an eye on her.

“Good.” She practically beamed. “Where did you say your friend was?”

“This way.” I responded and started walking.

Dark Town was as different from the rest of the city as night and day. There were no stone streets here, no fancy statues and a foul smell wafted up from cracks in the ground. It looked very much like it had been forgotten by all those that lived above.

I had the distinct feeling of being watched as we walked but I did not see anyone. That feeling was creeping up my spine in a strange sort of chill.

“So how do you know your way down here?” I asked. “If Keeper Merrill doesn't want you all to go down here I mean...”

“We used to come here more before.” She answered. “I lived in a house near here that had a hidden entrance down here.”

“Oh.” I answered, slightly in surprise. “So you came down here a lot?”

“No. Not really.” She wrinkled her nose as she thought about it. “There was a clinic down here too. People tried to help but...”

She trailed off and I did not push.

“Why would your friend be down here?” She asked instead.

“I'm not sure.” I answered truthfully. “He wasn't supposed to.”

I really, really hoped that he had come down here of his own free will and not because he had fallen prey to cultists or these bad men the woman had mentioned.

The woman had been right, these streets were far worse then the ones above. They twisted and wound about themselves in such ways that it was nearly impossible to navigate.

I did not want to admit it but I was getting frustrated with how nonsense these streets were.

Sighing yet again, I turned back to my new companion.

“You don't really know where he is, do you?” She blinked those big green eyes before leading the way. “Come on, we'll go to the main area and you can figure out from there.”

She darted through the streets like she was born there and had us out in a more open area within minutes.

“This way.” I said with a warm smile, grateful that she was at least being helpful.

Still, that old worry was at the back of my mind. Everyone had their alterior motives and I was worried that this woman might actually have reasons other then being helpful.

I led the way and went straight towards the part of Dark Town that smelled even worse then the rest. I could see that this direction was making my companion a little more on edge then before but I did not question it.

She could leave if she wanted to.

I looked towards the building in front of me and I just knew that Abelas was within. It was a strange sort of feeling but I knew I was right.

“I should be fine from here.” I smiled at her and nodded my head. “Thank you for showing me how to get around here.”

“You're welcome.” She responded with a smile.

“I can take it from here.” I prompted, hoping she would take the hint.

“Oh I'm still coming with you.” She continued to smile at me. “After you, Miss.”

I did not bother even sighing as I pushed open the door and went inside. She followed just a step behind me.

The building was just like the rest of Dark Town. Old, smelly and looking like it had been abandoned. The hallway was lit up with torches and helped to guide me in the direction I needed to go.

Thankfully, the building seemed to be a straightforward hallway with a few doors splitting off but nothing like the streets we had just wandered through to get there.

That warm Abelas feeling was getting stronger as I walked. Down a flight of stairs and behind a rather heavy set door.

The door was strange, almost cold to the touch but we were deep under ground at this point. There were a few designs on it that made it look almost like mechanical cogs and wheels but they seemed more like carvings.

I pushed the door open but the woman stopped me before I walked in.

“Let me go first.” She said softly.

I gave her a strange look but she had already shouldered past me and into the room. Irritated, I followed after her.

The room looked just like a regular dirt floored part of the building. The roof, however, was made of metal bars and almost like the walls of a cell. Light shown down through it and I stared blankly upwards for a brief moment. The walls above were far nicer then the

“Ma tarlan!” Abelas' voice, from the other side of the room, was somewhere between relief and warning. “The door!”

Abelas rushed over towards us, shoving the woman out of the way but he did not manage to reach it in time. It had closed behind me and that click was audible as it locked.

He swore several times in elvhen before turning to face us.

“Now that we're all stuck here, how do you propose we escape?” Abelas asked.


	9. Deepstalkers

I just stared at him before pinching the bridge of my nose at the absurdity of this situation.

“And exactly how did you get caught?” I asked, unable to keep the irritation out of my voice. “Or better yet, who are our captives?”

“I have not seen anyone above.” Abelas completely ignored my first question.

Sighing, I turned back to the door to look it over but there was no signs of a keyhole on this side of the door. There were the same intricate looking carvings but nothing to hint at a complicated locking system.

“It is no use, ma tarlan,” Abelas said as he walked back to the other side of the room. “There is no method of opening it from this side of the door.”

I looked over at him with a raised eyebrow.

“I have examined the doors thoroughly.”

I ignored what he said and moved to look at the other door near where he stood. It was of far plainer wood without even the barest hint of decoration. It just looked newer then the other door.

I glanced back to the young woman who had followed me and caught her staring up at the grate ceiling.

“Do you see something up there?” I asked.

“No.” She paused before glancing back at me. “But there should be something up there. I mean. Why would someone have a room like this with one above if not for a reason. Yet there isn't anything I can see up there. No chains, no chairs, nothing to hint at a purpose.”

I found myself staring at her. I had no idea what she was getting at but Abelas apparently seemed to catch on. He walked over to where she was standing but stared at her instead of looking up.

“And what would you know of rooms like these?” He had gone still, his face showing little of his emotions as he asked.

“I have seen in a room like this before.” She answered with a neutral tone. “I... I used to be a slave.” She said as if that was enough of an explanation. “The woman who owned me used to put slaves in a room like this one while she sat above. She liked to watch.”

“Liked to watch _what?_ ” Abelas asked her.

I turned towards the newer door with a sudden realization. Backing away, I inched myself towards the two of them.

“When slaves were old, or not capable of working...” The woman continued. “She would face them off against each other or...”

“Or what?” I demanded tersely.

“Spiders. She liked to put giant spiders in with them.”

I felt a wave of disgust at the thought. I really did not want to think of what would happen to the old or infirm against giant spiders.

Abelas' face had a similar look of disgust but he then proceeded to ignore the young woman as if she did not exist to him.

“I really hope there aren't spiders behind that door.” I mumbled under my breath.

“I... I don't think so.” The woman responded. “But I think we should get out of here. Keeper Merrill is going to be very upset that we're here.”

“Why?” I asked.

“I walked you into this.” She sounded like she believed this was entirely her fault. Guilt shining in those big eyes of her's.

“It's no fault of yours.” I waved my hand idly as Abelas stomped past me to look at the second door again. “I was following Abelas here, you were trying to be helpful.”

“But I live here, I know –“

“Silence!” Abelas said urgently.

I was about to say something to him when I heard it. A scrabbling sound that was suspiciously close to claws on stone. There was a faint hissing to accompany it.

“There is something on the other side of the door.” Abelas said as he ushered me further from the second door.

“Do you think it can get in?” The woman asked.

Abelas did not answer.

I turned towards the door and could see nothing wrong with the door. That claws on stone noise quickly became clawing. It was easy to understand that the creatures on the other side were now attacking the door.

A loud thump as something hit the door made me jump.

“You are not to fight.” Abelas said as he fixed me with a stare. “I will deal with whatever is there on the other side.”

He continued to stare at me and I knew there was no point in arguing with him. He moved to stand to one side of me while the young elf took a step to the opposing side. Both had moved to stand in front of me and I bit back whatever retort was building.

I felt Abelas' shield erupt around us, a sort of warm and familiar tinge of magic but then I felt a second. It was not that strong but it was there. Flickering beneath Abelas' shield like a second protection for us.

“You're a mage?!” I stared at the young woman in disbelief.

“Well... yes.” She looked at me with surprise. “I'm not the First to the Keeper but I'm one of her students.”

“Talk later!” Abelas hissed as the door exploded into splinters.

I had begun to expect spiders, at least that would be familiar and normal but no, what came through those doors were not spiders. They looked like lizards but their heads were strange, almost worm like with sharp teeth at the front. Most of them were about the size of a house cat, maybe a little bigger but there were a few that were easily the size of a mabari.

I did not recognize the things immediately but the young elf did.

“Deepstalkers!” She shouted.

Abelas was already moving towards them. His blade arcing out and slicing through the first couple of them. The woman was moving behind him, flames shooting from her hands to incinerate the deepstalkers closest to her.

The pack of deepstalkers stood no chance against them and between the two of them, they had most of them killed within minutes. Their bodies lay where they fell with some partially in the doorway.

Abelas turned towards me the moment the danger had passed.

“Ma tarlan, are you alright?” Abelas asked.

“Yeah, I'm fine.” I waved my hand to try and keep him from asking further.

I had done nothing. I had just stood there and watched as the two of them took on the deepstalkers. I had not attempted to cast even a single spell.

“And you?” He asked the young elf.

“F.. fine.” She stammered before frowning down at the dead animals. “Deepstalkers shouldn't be here.”

“What do you mean?” Abelas asked before I could.

“Deepstalkers aren't normally found in the city. They're usually in the Deep Roads.” Her frown deepened.

“I really hope there isn't a hole to the Deep Roads around here.” I walked towards the pair of them before staring down into the hallway from which the animals had come. “Perhaps that's a way out?”

“Not likely.” Abelas answered.

“Well, would you prefer to just wait here for our captives to come find us?” I said tersely.

“It's probably a dead end.” The woman said. “But you're right, I think it's better to look through there. If they were keeping the deepstalkers as pets, then someone must have been feeding them and I don't think they were feeding them here.”

“Very well.” Abelas flicked his gaze between the two of us before he started walking down the hallway.

I guessed that was his decision that we were indeed going to go down the hall. I shrugged at the woman and started to walk behind him. She hurried up to me and walked almost at my side.

The hallway started out like the same material that the room had been made of but it seemed older.

The light dimmed but the three of us had no problems with walking into the dark.

The further we went, the less it seemed like a hallway and more like a tunnel carved into the dirt. I was distinctly aware that we were gradually going down.

“I don't like this.” The woman answered.

“Neither do I.” Abelas seemed to share that sentiment.

There was a gradual sound of water up ahead. Something that was becoming louder as we approached near the bottom.

I could make out light ahead, and random crates stacked along the walls.

We came to a stop just behind a pile of crates. One of them had a hole bitten through it.

“I think this is where the deepstalkers came from.” The woman said but there was clear confusion in her voice. “Why would someone ship deepstalkers?”

Abelas was already looking inside the crate for answers.

“It seems deepstalkers were not their intention.” He said softly before getting to his feet. “I believe it is more a case of an infestation.”

I had no idea about the deepstalkers or their behaviours beyond their obvious attempt to attack us so I just remained silent.

“I don't recognize any of the markings on these crates.” The woman added. “Traders are supposed to mark their crates with their own emblem.”

“Regardless, standing here does not do us any good.” Abelas turned from the crates and motioned further down the tunnel. “I will scout ahead.”

“Oh no.” I shook my head. “We're sticking together this time.”

I fixed him with my best Inquisitor face. The one I had given soldiers when they had questioned the orders from a tiny little elf woman.

He stared back at me as if he was trying to sort out whether to argue or not. In the end he just shrugged.

“As you wish, ma tarlan.”

He turned quickly and headed down the hallway to where the light was the brightest.

The woman followed along beside me once more as we walked.

We stepped out of the tunnel and found ourselves on the inside of a small cave. A pool of water filled more then half the floor and massive stalactites hung from above. Plants clung to the walls and the majority of the light seemed to come from glowing mushrooms that skirted the edges of the water.

“Wow.” The young woman said. “That looks like deep mushrooms but I've never seen them with that kind of glow before.”

“Neither have I.” I admitted.

“We should continue on.” Abelas responded but there was a strange set to his jaw. He still had his sword out but now I could clearly see the tight grip on the hilt.

“Alright.” I merely said as I realized he was tense.

Abelas nodded and continued down the tunnel, with me and the woman following close behind.

It looked the same as the path we had taken in but there was a brief fork in the tunnel. A close look to the right one made it look more like the recent stone of the lower part of Kirkwall but a cave in had blocked the way. The path on the left continued downward.

Abelas glanced back at me with a frown before he sighed and continued down the open pathway. Those strange glowing mushrooms clung to the wall in random patches. It lit the tunnel up but it was a little spooky.

I had this feeling creeping over me as we went down that tunnel. It was almost like when I had walked into Adahldur and found nothing there.

“I don't like this place.” The woman said.

Neither Abelas or I said anything in response to her as we came to a great wide cavern.

The woman gasped as we all just stared into the abyss that opened up beneath us.

There, we could see buildings. Huge buildings that seemed carved out of a single gigantic piece of stone. Those glowing mushrooms lined the way down. Some even growing up the sides of the nearest buildings but most of the overgrowth was a strange moss. Rising from between the buildings were towering statues that put the ones above to shame.

The three of us stared down into that city.

_Emerius._ The name came to me without thinking about it.

“This is...” The woman seemed to stammer.

“The City of Chains.” I answered for her.

Abelas looked at me in confusion and I recalled that he had been primarily holed up with the other sentinels of Mythal.

“Emerius,” I tried to explain. “It was a city founded by the Tevinter Imperium.”

“We were told that Kirkwall was Emerius.” The woman frowned. “But if it's under Kirkwall... Oh Creator's... this was a slave city. It was _the_ slave city. Hawke had books about this place.”

I blinked. I knew that name.

“Hawke? As in... Garret Hawke?” I stared at her. I remembered the man who I had left to die in the Fade. That choice was one I could never forget, even with the thousands of years wandering the hall of memories.

Just another thing I was responsible for.

“Yes. Messir Hawke rescued me and gave me employment.” She said as she bobbed her head. “He was good friends with Keeper Merrill, she took me in after...” She paused and the grief on her face was plainly visible. “After the Chantry fell.”

Abelas' confusion only grew.

“A few years ago,” I said to him. “Before we went to the vir'abelasan, a man blew up the Chantry in Kirkwall. It's what resulted in the problem with Templars and Mages.”

I really hoped he knew what those meant as there really was not time for a history lesson.

“Yes.” The woman said with a nod. “And then you managed to fix that problem.”

My head whipped over to look at her.

“You know who I am?”

Abelas inched closer to me, his gaze now fixed on the woman.

“Of course.” She smiled at me before realizing that look on Abelas' face. “Oh... I'm sorry. I thought you knew that I knew...”

“No.” I said with a grumble before pinching my nose. “So exactly how much do you know?”

“You're the Herald, the Inquisitor.” Those big eyes looked so full of awe. “Keeper Merrill and the Viscount told me all about you. You saved the world.”

“I had help.” I tried to say something that did not make this any more awkward then it already was. “Is that why you wanted to help me?”

“Well, yes.” She smiled. “Keeper Merrill already sent word to her students that you were in Kirkwall and that she would be there within a day to talk with you. She's really excited to meet you.”

I shook my head but said nothing.

“A meeting between the two of them is not going to happen unless we find a way out of here.” Abelas said with an annoyed tone.

“Let's head back up to the break in the path to see if there is any way to move those rocks.” I said quickly before striding off on my own. I knew the other two would follow and I had no interest in hearing about myself if this woman wanted to continue.

“If it helps,” I heard her speaking behind me. “My name is Orana.”

“I don't care.” Abelas responded gruffly.

My thoughts ran wild as I walked back up to the split in the path. If this woman, this Orana, knew who I was then there was a greater chance that other people in the city knew who I was. I had been careful not to give my name when I could but if she had recognized me on sight alone, then who else was capable of doing the same.

Being in this place was far more worrisome then it had been before. Especially if those cultists were here and in this place.

I stopped only when we had reached the rock slide. Several minutes of looking made it clear that there was no way to move those rocks. It would require a tremendous amount of magic but it clearly looked like it might start off a chain reaction and take down the rest of the ceiling.

Abelas looked it over but it was clear he had the same thoughts.

“Alright... to hell with it.” I looked over at Abelas, not caring that Orana could hear us. “I want you to walk me through drawing on your magic.”

“Why?” He eyed the rocks cautiously.

“We're going back to the initial chamber and I'm going to blow a hole in that damn door.”

“Are you sure that's wise...?” He questioned.

“I don't care that I'm weakened right now. We're getting out of here before whomever owns this place comes back.” I did not allow him time to argue as I stomped off for the room with two doors.

Abelas explained carefully and quickly in ancient Elvhen how to do what I needed to do. I was pleasantly surprised that it was not that different from when I had learned magic with Mythal.

The same principle was there and I knew I could do it.

I just was not prepared for the audience that waited for us when we got back to that room.

“Lookit this. Two city elves and a Dalish.” There was about six men standing there, all dressed in various levels of gear. The one closest to us was the one talking. “How much do you think we'd get for them, boys?”

“I don't know. They don't look worth the trouble.” One of them answered. “Especially if they were too far down the tunnel.”

Abelas once more interposed himself between me and this new threat.

“We don't want any trouble.” I said quickly. “We just turned a wrong turn and ended up in here.”

“You already found trouble, little lady.” The first said with a sneer. “Your boy toy isn't going to do much to save you.”

I tried to stifle the laugh but ended up making a snorting-huff noise.

“I'm trying to save you.” I managed afterwards. Even if I knew that Abelas was more then capable of taking care of business, I really did not want a fight right now. We had only just dealt with the deepstalkers.

“Save us?” The man laughed.

“Well, look at his armour.” Orana said simply. “Or his sword. He doesn't look like your average Dalish, now does he?”

The others looked between themselves and Abelas, a dawning sort of realization crossing their features.

“Just let us pass and we won't tell anyone that we were here.” I said in a pleasant tone.

“Sorry, but I don't believe that.” He said with a shake of his head.

Orana moved closer to me but I never looked away from Abelas in front of me and these brigands in front of him.

“They're mages.” His second suddenly said, his eyes lazily flicking between the three of us before settling on Abelas. “I don't think we should do this, boss.”

“Don't tell me you're getting chicken.” His boss responded.

“You'd get chicken if you could sense him.” He grimaced before backing towards the door. “You're on your own with this one.”

I did not look towards the man who was leaving or at the other two that decided to join him. I just stared at the guy in charge.

“Cowards.” He muttered. “I'm not afraid of fucking knife eared apostates.”

“How about the Captain of the Guard and the Viscount?” Varric's voice from just beyond the door was enough to bring a sigh of relief.

I was certain I heard other people putting their own names forward but I did not quite make it out over the sudden shuffling of feet as guards practically poured into the room. Within seconds, we were ringed by the Kirkwall city guards.

“Hey Daffodil, I'd wondered where you'd gotten to.” Varric said as he walked in.

Aveline walked next to him, followed by a dark haired elf wearing the outfit of a Keeper and a tall man wearing heavy armour. All four of them looked completely relaxed as if this was just another regular event for them. At least I assumed all four of them looked that way as I could see nothing of the man's face behind his helmet.

“Sorry, Viscount Tethras, I didn't think we'd find our way into a place like this.” Orana said with a small smile.

“Don't worry about it.” He chuckled before turning towards the men who were surrounded. “Guard Captain, how about you take these men into custody.”

“With pleasure.” Aveline said, not letting the men get a word in before they were all being dragged out by the guards.

“Now, why exactly were you wandering around down here?” Varric said as they left.

“Trying to find our way out.” I answered as I laid a hand on Abelas' shoulder.

The sentinel instantly relaxed and slid his sword back into it's sheath but he did not leave where he was standing.

Orana had already moved over towards the elf and armoured man, the three of them quickly talking in elvhen. I was a bit surprised to hear it but I ignored them for the most part.

“You'll never believe this, Varric, but apparently your city is built on top of Emerius and not actually Emerius.” I said with a small shrug.

“You're serious?” He said with a laugh before shaking his head. “Only you would go wandering off into ancient ruins when you're supposed to be meeting with people.”

“Well, wasn't intention and I didn't really go into them. I just saw them.” I jerked my thumb back the way we had come from. “Down that tunnel will take you to a ledge that over looks the old city. There are some funky glowing mushrooms along the way, can't miss it.”

“We'll have a look at it later.” Varric shook his head at me before turning towards his other two companions. “This is who I wanted you to meet. Ethara, this is Merrill.”


	10. Merrill

Merrill merely introduced herself before leading the way. Both Orana and the armoured human stayed close beside her. I could hear them all speaking to one another but none of the conversation was directed my way.

I was surprisingly alright with that.

Abelas kept as close to me as they were to Merrill but he said nothing. I deliberately hung back so that I could at least try to talk to him.

“ _Abelas?”_ I questioned in ancient elvhen, keeping my voice low. “ _Care to explain how that happened?”_

The fact that he had somehow managed to fall into a simple bandit's trap actually confused the ever loving fade out of me. He had led Mythal's sentinels and then assisted Solas in whatever capacity. A simple trap should not have held him.

“ _I was distracted.”_ He answered but did not meet my eyes when I looked at him.

“ _Distracted?”_ I almost laughed at that answer.

“ _I do not wish to discuss it.”_ His tone was like a scolded child's.

I wanted to push him for answers but I thought better of it. I could hear the conversation between the three up ahead, a mix of the trade tongue and ancient elvhen. It was strange to hear it but it was enough to warrant caution with what Abelas and I might say to one another.

Not that I thought Merrill was not to be trusted but I did not know the three before me. Two elves and human.

I nearly stopped when I realized that the human must be Carver Hawke.

“ _Are you alright?”_ Abelas asked, noticing the falter in my steps.

“ _Fine.”_ I answered as I found something else to look at while we walked.

He did not push either but it was clear he did not believe me.

I did not want to tell Abelas about what I knew of the Hawkes, or of Garrett Hawke to be more precise. My memory of the human was one of the few that had always stuck with me.

He was the one who I had left behind in the fade.

I just hoped that his brother was not the type to hold a grudge, although his anger at me would be justified.

“This way.” Merrill said cheerfully as she led the way into the Elvhen Alienage.

I was surprised as I had assumed we were going to the Keep but it did kind of make sense that she would head here.

She led the elves and this was the home of the elves in the city.

Merrill did not stop in her stride towards a house on the far side of the alienage but Orana darted off. The remaining four of us stopped only for Merrill to unlock the door, say hello to a nearby elf, and then we were inside the building.

It was clear that it must have been a home at one point. A small fireplace, a table with chairs. A door leading off to another room. It did not look like it was lived in but there was something that was almost cozy about the place.

Merrill moved to sit down in one of the chairs while the human, Carver, stood beside her. She motioned to the free chair beside her and I sank into it.

“You know, I really wanted to meet you while you were leading the Inquisition.” Merrill said with a small grin. “But things here kept me busy.”

“Varric told me that you united the elves here.” I said with a nod. “I think that's a little more important.”

“Maybe.” Merrill said thoughtfully before she tilted her head. “Do you know you talk with an accent?”

“What?” I asked, suddenly unsure where that had come from.

“Yes. An accent. Not like those from Clan Lavellan but it's there.” Her nose wrinkled up as she continued to think about it. “I can't place it but it's noticeable. Really noticeable.”

I was not sure how to take that so I merely kept my mouth closed.

“Oh, I don't mean it's a bad thing.” She frowned, more at herself then at me. “Goodness, that was a little rude of me, wasn't it? First time we start talking and I comment on your accent.”

“I think you should focus on what you wanted to talk to her about.” Carver said with a small chuckle behind his helmet.

“And I think you should take off that dreadful helmet.” Merrill said as she looked up at him with adoring eyes.

Carver chuckled again before removing the helmet to set it aside. He looked very much like Garrett had. The same eyes, the same jawline, the same ruffled hair. Of course, he did not have the stubble I remembered on Garrett but there was no mistaking them as anything other then siblings.

“Happy now?” He shook his head at her before staring back at me.

“Much.” She beamed before glancing back to me. “I know Varric has said otherwise but you should know that I know about the cultists.”

I could practically feel Abelas tense up next to me.

“Are you certain of that?” Abelas asked, his tone low.

“Very.” Merrill fixed him with a strange look before looking back to me. “We had an elf who tried to come back to us after what happened beneath the mountain. He told us pretty much everything.”

A cultist turn coat.

Somehow I was not surprised by that at all. My father had not been the kindest man and without him instilling fear in his followers, most probably jumped ship.

“Is he still with your clan?” I asked.

“No.” Carver answered, his face becoming grim.

I did not ask what became of the elf as I knew by that look.

“That being said, Varric is wrong about why they are here in the city.” Merrill said, completely glossing over the subject. “They aren't here looking for you or for Fen'Harel.”

Abelas tensed even further but he did not say anything this time.

“Then why are they here?” I asked.

“Emerius.” Merrill said with a frown. “You happened to wander into one of the entrances of it, one we have been looking for actually.”

“Why would they be looking for Emerius?”

“Because Emerius was the home of one of the Magisters Sidereal.” Merrill answered.

“How would you even know that?” I continued to question.

I vaguely remembered what the Magisters Sidereal were. The servants of the old gods who had pierced the veil in an effort to reach the Golden City. I just did not remember mention of any of them living in specific cities outside of the capital of the Tevinter Imperium.

“We found documents about a temple in Emerius. More digging revealed that the Appraiser of Andoral, one of the Magisters, lived most of his time here. What better place for the High Priest of Slavery then in the City of Chains itself?”

“Alright but what are they looking for in Emerius?” I asked.

“A way through the veil.” Abelas answered simply.

“Yes.” Merrill said with a nod. “You denied them that way through and now they're looking for another way.”

The thought that they were hunting for a new way through the veil was a bit terrifying to me. I knew what lay beyond and what would happen if they brought it through but yet, there they were, still determined to bring about the end of the world.

“My guess is that they want to find a way through first and then find you.” Merrill said with a small shrug. “Quite intelligent for a bunch of fanatics if you ask me.”

“So you really do know then?” I could not stop myself from asking.

“Yes.” Merrill said with a clear look of sympathy on her face. “What they intend to do with you... I can't even imagine. I mean... do they even realize what is going to happen if they try and pull that through to the waking world? Abominations would be the least of their worries.”

I did not want her sympathy but I said nothing. It was just another reminder what the cultists were up to.

“Do you know if they have found anything?” I asked.

“Doubtful.” Carver said as he shook his head. “We did some looking and if they even managed to find a vault belonging to the Magister, they won't be able to do a damn thing with it.”

“Why not?” I asked.

“The old Magisters of the Imperium, and not just the Magisters Sidereal, were really fond of magically locking their vaults.” Merrill said with a small smile. “If he was anything like the others, then he probably has it sealed up tighter then... well... a lock that can't be opened.”

Even if we had gotten off on an awkward foot, I could see myself liking this Merrill. Perhaps even a friend.

“But yeah, there is no way they're going to be able to open any vault if it belonged to him.”

“What if the magical seals weakened?” Abelas asked as if that should have been an obvious thought.

“That's the problem.” Merrill said with a nod. “We thought that too but we know someone who tried to get into a vault from the ancient Imperium already. She nearly fried herself.”

“Our friend, Isabela.” Carver explained. “She'd gotten wind of a vault and thought it would be just an easy score. It didn't go quite as planned.”

I did not remember an Isabela but then, I only remembered the Hawkes because I killed one.

“Well, it's a little bit of a relief knowing that they're focusing on something else instead of me. That means I can get back to Skyhold a lot easier.” I said.

“If you're going by ship, I think we can send word for her to come here.” Carver said thoughtfully.

“Oh that would be wonderful.” Merrill said with a grin. “I haven't gotten to see her in quite a while. And she promised me a girl's night out when she's back in Kirkwall.”

“I was kind of hoping to actually travel by Eluvian.” I said a little sheepishly.

“Eluvian?” Merrill quirked an eyebrow at me. “There aren't any functioning eluvians here in Kirkwall.”

“No but I did hear that you have a non-functioning one.” I responded.

“Well yes...”

“And you have an Arulin'Holm.” I continued.

“I have tried to repair it but it doesn't work.” Merrill said with a frown.

“I can get it to work.” I said with confidence even if I was not entirely sure how I could get it to work. “If you give me the Arulin'Holm, I can open the eluvian and get access to the others for you and your clan.”

Merrill went silent as she considered it. Carver said nothing either, merely staring at me and I truly hoped that it was just because of how outlandish my offer sounded.

“Alright but on one other condition.” Merrill said softly.

“What's that?” I asked.

“When you go, take Orana with you.” Merrill said. “Varric has already arranged for your Ambassador to teach her so it would be far easier for her to get to Skyhold in your care.”

I blinked, having not expected that request at all. I glanced up at Abelas who merely shrugged, making it clear that this was completely my decision in the matter.

“Very well.” I nodded in agreement. “If she wants to go with us that is.”

“She won't be much trouble.” Merrill said quickly. “And if you're going by eluvian, it won't take too long for you to get there.”

“That's if you can fix the one that is broken here.” Carver said with a small shrug.

“I can fix it.” I chafed at his insinuation.

He said nothing else and merely shrugged.

“Let me go speak with her.” Merrill said as she got to her feet and stepped out too quickly for me to say anything.

I sat there between the two men as that silence seemed to grow and become awkward. Maybe it was my sudden surge of guilt but I felt more and more uncomfortable. Finally, I could not handle it any longer and spoke up.

“I'm sorry about your brother.” I said.

Carver blinked very slowly at me as if he was having difficulty processing what I was saying.

“I did not want to leave anyone behind but someone had to-”

“Enough.” Carver said as he held up his hand towards me.

Abelas moved between the two of us far more quickly then it took for me to take in a breath.

Carver looked surprised at the other man but returned his attention back to me.

“You don't need to apologize for that. I knew my brother.” Carver's voice became sad. “I understood full well that if he stayed in the fade it was because he decided to, not because someone else told him he had to.”

I had never considered that but then I tried not to consider much about that particular event.

“I don't hate you or the Warden for it. Well... maybe I hate the Wardens a little because they were so bloody stupid but not you.” He actually grinned at me. “You did kill Corypheus after all and that was the ass that was responsible for it all in the long run.”

“Well... if you say so.” I did not want to push it further then that. He did seem genuine.

The door opening was enough to end the conversation regardless if either of us were going to say anything. Merrill had returned with Orana in tow.

“Alright, let me show you my eluvian.” Merrill said with a small grin before leading the way to the other room in this little home.

I got up and followed.

The other room was clearly a bed room, a small bed against the wall with the eluvian nearly dead center in the room. It was a smaller one, nothing like the gigantic one from Solas' keep or even the ones that Morrigan owned. It would be enough for us to get through but the horses were now out of the question.

“Here is the Arulin'Holm.” Merrill said as she rummaged through the nearby chest. The tool was still wrapped in cloth when it was handed to me.

“This might take me a little bit.” I answered truthfully as I stared back at the eluvian.

I could see where it had been broken but to the casual observer, it just looked like a regular old mirror. Without asking, I leaned close to it and ran my fingers along that nearly invisible line.

I was a bit surprised to feel the magic in the eluvian reacting to my crystalline hand. That must have been what Solas had been referring to, that I would be able to repair it because I had a tool far greater then just the Arulin'Holm.

That pulse of magic seemed to curl around my fingers and I wondered what would happen if I just gave it a little tug.

Without really thinking it over, I did just that.

Magic enveloped the five of us before a bright light snapped through the entire room and I felt myself lose consciousness.


End file.
